Blasphemous thoughts can intrude upon the most devoted believer -- but for some, they become chronic, sticky, and absolutely terrifying. In this guide, we'll cover everything you ever wanted to know about these intrusive thoughts, such as:
- What are blasphemous thoughts (meaning)?
- Are blasphemous thoughts sin?
- Will God forgive blasphemous thoughts?
- Does God forgive intrusive thoughts?
- Can you commit blasphemy in your mind?
- Is there a way on how to get rid of blasphemous thoughts?
- And many more...
You are a devoted follower of God. You've pledged yourself to His service and have poured out your heart in surrender, love, and commitment. God is your life. But on days when awful, profane thoughts pop into your mind unbidden, you can't help but question your entire religious experience. You keep having blasphemous thoughts.
|What are examples of blasphemous thoughts?|
- Intrusive thoughts about God
- Thoughts that make you doubt your beliefs...
- Thoughts that urge you to curse God, deny Christ, or pray to Satan...
- Thoughts about ugly, sacrilegious deeds you dare not express...
- Even nasty blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit and God that seem to beat in the rhythm of everyday sounds.
Why do I have these thoughts as a true believer?
You don't want these thoughts, and you don't like them. When they force themselves into your mind, you panic. You push back frantically, trying your best to stay true to what you really believe and love. The more you struggle, the worse these thoughts become, until you exhaust yourself with anxiety and fear. You swear you didn't mean to think those thoughts -- but how do you really know?
Unwanted thoughts about God or religion happen to every spiritually inclined person.
But for some people, they can come with so much repetition and intensity that you might feel like you're going crazy. Typically, these are people who have scrupulosity, also known as religious OCD.
"OCD" is often used as an adjective for people who like to keep things clean and tidy. However, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder is a real mental health issue that affects about 2% of the world's population.
Sometimes the subject matter of OCD is germs. Sometimes it is orderliness. But other times it relates to religion, morality, sexuality, or the potential of causing harm to others. For those with religious obsessions and compulsions, sacrilegious and profane thoughts are surprisingly common.
Before you continue reading, it will be important to have your blasphemous thoughts results in mind as you read this guide.
Take the quiz below to determine if your profane thoughts are caused by religious OCD or not. It will be important to know your results for the remaining sections of this article, so go ahead and take it now (you won't need to leave this page and your results will be shown right here).
If your results indicated that your blasphemous thoughts are likely caused by moral OCD, this article is for you. You'll find here a complete and redemptive guide to dealing with the profane thoughts of scrupulosity.
Before you move on, be sure to like my Facebook page, follow me on Twitter, and subscribe to my Youtube channel for secrets and insights about OCD and blasphemous thought.
Why Do I Have Bad Religious Thoughts?
Not all "bad" religious thoughts are the same. Sometimes a scary doubt or negative thought can actually be positive. Other times, they can be completely worthless, unimportant mental noise. Let's take a look at three kinds of uncomfortable religious thoughts you may be experiencing in greater detail:
Convictions that don't fit with your faith community
A new experience and level of being "real" with God
The intrusive thoughts of religious OCD (scrupulosity)
Type 1: Convictions that Don’t Fit With Your Faith Community
Human beings are designed to live in community. We crave a sense of belonging. Connections give us a feeling of safety, so we are very hesitant to do anything against the norm that may endanger our social belongingness.
That’s one reason why it’s so tough to change religious beliefs.
Most spiritually inclined people are deeply enmeshed in a religious community. Some may even be employed by a particular ministry or church organization. Getting doubts about your beliefs and practices can carry a lot of far-reaching implications!
Not surprisingly, challenges to your long-held beliefs can be hard to handle, particularly if you are enmeshed in a faith community that expects you to be unswervingly loyal to these beliefs.
But guess what? Most of us on planet earth don’t have all our ducks in a row. In fact, I would go so far as to say that there isn’t a single religious system or denomination that has 100% of God’s truth.
We just don’t. None of us do.
This doesn’t mean truth is relative or that I would endorse postmodern philosophical foundations. But let’s have a bit of methodological humility and admit that although some denominations are more biblical than others, no one can claim to know everything.
“Now we know in part,” says the Apostle Paul in 1 Corinthians 13:12, but we don’t know in totality. God probably chuckles as He watches us argue over doctrinal points. We know 0.00002% of all there is to know in the universe and yet we spew dogma as if we know everything.
Apostle Paul - 1 Corinthians 13:12
For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.
Don’t get me wrong — studying and learning is good. I’m working on my fourth degree. I’m all for philosophizing and churning out apologetic answers.
But we ought to be humble and admit that there is a lot we don’t know. There are things we might be wrong about. There are things our entire faith community might be missing, just like the Jews missed out on the Messiah when He came.
Getting an onslaught of spiritual doubts that go against the grain of your faith community might be very disturbing to you. It might feel like you’re betraying God, your beliefs, and the people you love.
But maybe those doubts have some truth to them. If they are backed by evidence from Scripture, and they keep coming back around, it might be God convicting your heart.
How Do I Know If This Is My Type of Blasphemous Thought?
This type of scary religious thought -- conviction about something new -- may apply to you if:
- Your so-called "blasphemous thoughts" are questions or doubts about your faith community's doctrines
- Your thoughts are criticisms of the way your faith community operates or treats people
- Your thoughts are related to logic or "making sense"
The scary thoughts of conviction probably don't apply to you if:
- Your blasphemous thoughts are bizarre, repetitive, and illogical
- Your thoughts are not a direct question or criticism of any part of the spiritual experience but feel more like "attacks" against God
What Should I Do If This Describes Me?
If you think your uncomfortable doubt is a legitimate conviction, don't run from it.
Be willing to submit yourself to the Word of God, even if it's teaching you something new or at odds with your faith community.
I have a very international social group, and many of my friends grew up in non-Christian families. Many of them experienced social difficulties and even persecution when they began doubting their beliefs. In the beginning, they felt like these thoughts were strange and unwanted, but as they investigated further, they discovered truth and beauty.
Guess what? This experience isn't just for non-Christian religions or cults.
God is leading all of us through a constant process of refinement. There is always more to learn, more to grow. Just because you're Christian doesn't mean you've got it all right yet! Doubt can be a powerful tool in God's hand to convict you of greater truth.
Type 2: Being “Real” with God
Having a seemingly awful thought towards God may also be a sign of deepening authenticity.
In my younger years, I used to have a Pollyanna-type relationship with God. Everything was perfect, I was thankful for everything that came my way (or at least I tried to convince myself of this), and I only brought my positive emotions to God.
Even when I felt confused, stressed, and angry, I blamed myself. I stuffed it down and thought it would be “unholy” to express in prayer.
But after going through a series of severe difficulties, I finally cracked. Why was God allowing this to happen to me? Why didn’t He intervene?
I fell to my knees and poured out my bitterness in prayer. As it says in Psalm 142:2, “I pour out my complaint before Him; I declare before Him my trouble.” I complained — and not with Pollyanna’s positive outlook.
Over the next weeks, as I passed through more challenging times, I continued voicing negative thoughts about God. They were raw. Real. Authentic.
Most people, if they would have heard the kinds of complaints I made against God, would have thought I was on the brink of atheism. But I wasn’t. I was finally breaking out of the super-Christian façade. And God, I believe, was ok with that.
Having negative or blasphemous thoughts against God does not always mean there is something wrong with you. It may be a sign that you are breaking apart an old habit of toxic positivity and becoming more “real” in your relationship with God.
How Do I Know If This Is My Type of Blasphemous Thought?
This type of blasphemous thought may apply to you if:
- You have a history of being an overly-positive super-Christian
- You typically hold back or stuff down your emotions, particularly in your relationship with God
- You find yourself going through very difficult times and are struggling to maintain your emotional façade
But these scary thoughts against God probably don’t apply to you if:
- You already have a balanced relationship with God that includes the ability to voice your feelings
- Your thoughts against God are illogical and unrelated to any past traumas or present challenges in your life
If you find yourself having scary, unwanted blasphemous thoughts against God that are not caused by spiritual conviction and are not caused by a new relationship of authenticity with God, there’s one more possible cause. Let’s investigate our third and last option.
Type 3: The Intrusive Thoughts of Religious OCD
An “intrusive thought” is a name for something that happens when you have certain mental health disorders. Most often, intrusive thoughts happen to people who have obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Intrusive thoughts are words, mental images, ideas, or any other kind of thought that pops into your mind unbidden and unwanted. It causes severe distress, since you typically don’t know where it came from and why you’re thinking about something that strikes so violently against your core beliefs and loyalties. To make it worse, these thoughts won’t go away. They are:
Since most people who have OCD typically struggle with one or two main areas of obsession, intrusive thoughts can center on many different themes. If you have OCD, you may get intrusive thoughts in one or more of the following areas:
- Contamination (obsession about spreading germs or contracting a disease)
- Harm (afraid you may lose control and hurt someone)
- Sexuality (obsession about possibly being a homosexual, a pedophile, or a sexual predator)
- Philosophy (obsessions about whether you truly exist or not, or whether your life has meaning)
- Morality (fear that you have made ethical mistakes)
- Spirituality (obsessions about being damned, urges to curse God or commit sacrilegious acts)
Do you have scrupulosity? Take the test HERE!
These kinds of blasphemous thoughts are different from the first two. The first two signal a growing, maturing Christian experience. But intrusive thoughts have nothing to do with your spiritual reality. Instead, they are signs of a mental health condition.
If you have these kinds of blasphemous thoughts, you should know that it isn’t part of a normal religious experience, and it isn’t your fault for having this. And thankfully, it’s something you can fix.
What Is Scrupulosity? And Why Do I Get These Bad Religious Thoughts?
“Scrupulosity” is another name for Religious OCD. It’s what happens when obsessive-compulsive disorder hijacks your spirituality. It comes from the word “scruples” — a strong moral or ethical reservation.
Scrupulosity has three main parts:
- Intrusive Thoughts
Very often — or, let me say, extremely often — these intrusive thoughts are unwilling, unwanted blasphemous thoughts against God.
To read more about the obsessions and compulsions of scrupulosity, read my Ultimate Guide to Scrupulosity here!
What kind of blasphemous thoughts are we talking about? Here are a few of the most common ones:
- Abusive words towards God
- Disavowing, rejecting, or denying Christ
- Projection of “self” as God or thoughts of receiving worship
- Hatred or negative emotions towards God
- Sacrilegious mental images
- Inappropriate sexual thoughts about God or other religious figures
- Intrusive thoughts about worshipping Satan or being possessed by a demon
Does this sound like what you’re experiencing? Well, read on.
I’ll help you break down the most important facts you need to know to stop these blasphemous thoughts in their tracks.
What Are Intrusive Thoughts?
Many of the clients I work with are very bothered by their blasphemous thoughts because they aren’t convinced that these thoughts are not from them. They struggle to differentiate between their thoughts and the alien productions of OCD.
Let me share one secret that will make this process easier.
There are two ways to categorize thoughts:
An ego-syntonic thought is anything you think that is in accordance with your ego. It is a thought that feels harmonious with your core values and beliefs. It is a thought that affirms the “real you.”
Now, not every ego-syntonic thought is objectively correct. For example, Nazi soldiers believed that the Arian race was superior to Jews and that ethnic cleansing would bring about a race of Übermenschen. When they brutally murdered the Jews during the holocaust, many were acting in accordance with their values and beliefs.
Thus, their thoughts and intents to kill Jews was ego-syntonic. It was not ethically right, but it was internally harmonious for their egos.
On the other hand, an ego-dystonic thought is any thought which seems to conflict with the ego. It seems alien, as though coming from outside the “true self.” It is unwanted, unplanned, uninitiated.
Ego-dystonic thoughts, also, may be objectively correct or incorrect — but they are perceived as being at odds with the self.
Is It Me, or My OCD? 4 Characteristics of Intrusive Thoughts
Intrusive thoughts (including the blasphemous kind) have four main characteristics. I like to summarize these four characteristics with the acronym RUMP. Intrusive thoughts are:
Let’s look at each of these characteristics and how it is important to finding our escape from blasphemous thoughts.
Intrusive Thoughts are Repetitive
The first characteristic of intrusive thoughts is repetitiveness (the “R” in RUMP).
Have you ever gotten a thought that just won’t go away, no matter what you do? It just keeps coming back and consuming your attention. It makes you feel like you have to solve it or do something to make it go away.
You may struggle with a blasphemous thought for several hours, days, or even years. John Bunyan, author of the famous Pilgrim’s Progress, struggled with blasphemous thoughts urging him to deny Christ. He spent up to several hours of each day struggling against these thoughts. It was a challenge that went on for years before he found relief.
The repetitive nature of intrusive thoughts mean they’ll keep coming back again and again. And if you get bored of one, it’ll morph into a different form to make sure it maintains your attention.
Intrusive Thoughts are Unwanted
Again, intrusive thoughts are ego-dystonic. They are unwanted and seem to come from beyond the conscious ego. They are alien, foreign, and disgustingly undesired.
This marks a key difference between the “apostate” and the person with OCD. If someone honestly wishes to change his religious status, leave his religion, curse God, or use abusive language towards a deity, he will do so without reservation.
But for the person who gets these thoughts while simultaneously having a deep sense of loyalty towards God, it is clearly unwanted. This constitutes the “U” in our acronym RUMP. Intrusive thoughts are Repetitive, Unwanted, and now we will see that they appear to have Meaning.
Intrusive Thoughts are Meaningful
No intrusive thought would cause fear unless it seemed to have some kind of inherent meaning.
Most people with OCD do believe that their intrusive thoughts are meaningful — either that they will come true or already have.
- Having an abusive thought against God MEANS you believe that thought
- Thinking something sacrilegious MEANS you are apostate or damned
- Getting random thoughts that you might be praying to yourself MEANS you are prideful and believe you are God
Since intrusive thoughts are ego-dystonic, they don’t have the same inherent meaning that purposeful thoughts do. They are not chosen thoughts, therefore they are not meaningful. But they are perceived to be meaningful, which makes them ever-so-uncomfortable.
Intrusive Thoughts are Powerful
We have seen how intrusive thoughts are Repetitive, Unwanted, and Meaningful — now we will see that they are also viewed as being very Powerful (RUMP).
These intrusive, blasphemous thoughts are believed to have power to actually cause something to happen. For the person with religious OCD, this typically relates to a person’s spiritual life and destiny.
The perceived power (and notice I do not say “real” power) of intrusive thoughts relates to something called “thought-action fusion.” This is a term used with mental health issues to refer to the magical, almost superstitious connection that some people make between thoughts and reality.
But the bottom line? Thoughts have VERY little relationship to the real world. If they did, I would just sit down and think up a million dollars for myself.
But that doesn’t work. Everybody has crazy fantasies, mean intentions, and ugly thoughts from time to time. But most people never act on these thoughts, so they are never actualized in real life. In fact, you cant even be held accountable for your thoughts in a court of law — only for actions!
So another important point about intrusive thoughts is that they are believed to have power (even though they do not).
This summarizes the four main characteristics of intrusive thoughts: they are Repetitive, Unwanted, Meaningful, and Powerful (RUMP). This can help you differentiate between your own thoughts and the intrusive thoughts of OCD.
Those Naughty Intrusive Thoughts — Here’s What Else They Can Cause!
Unfortunately, intrusive blasphemous thoughts aren’t alone when they ring the doorbell. They bring the whole gang: obsessions and compulsions, too!
Having these scary, unwanted, perceived-to-be-meaningful thoughts can be so distressing that people go to great lengths to fix them. This well-intentioned “fixing” takes two main forms.
First of all, the scrupulous person will begin with obsession. Why did I have that blasphemous thought? Was it really me? What will this mean for my eternal salvation? Should I ask forgiveness, or is it too late?
The blasphemous thought brings an incredible load of false guilt and feelings of impending doom. Like the prophet Isaiah cried out, “Woe is me! For I am undone,” the scrupulous person feels that they are at the very end of their lifeline. Everything feels out of order, uncertain, terrifying.
This is where compulsions enter the picture — the second attempt to “fix” blasphemous thoughts.
A compulsion is any action that is done in order to alleviate the feelings of anxiety that come with the blasphemous thoughts.
These compulsions are meant to cancel, resist, fix, solve, or atone for the negative religious thoughts. For example:
- Praying a prayer of repentance
- Repeating verses a certain number of times
- Ruminating on the event to try to figure out if your blasphemous thought was genuine
- Seeking reassurance from a religious leader that you are not damned and have not committed the unpardonable sin
- Giving in charity, making personal sacrifices, or making pacts with God
These kinds of compulsive behaviors do not spring from a heart of genuine worship. They are panicked, reactive responses to ego-dystonic religious thoughts.
Which means two things: first of all, these compulsions aren’t necessary. Second of all, they aren’t effective. Not only do they lack the true spirit that is necessary for genuine worship, but they are also ineffective at fixing your obsessive-compulsive anxiety. For that reason, compulsions are generally viewed negatively during the recovery process.
You Aren’t Blaspheming; It’s Your Intrusive Thoughts
Everybody has weird, inappropriate thoughts from time to time. Most people let the thought go in one side of the brain and right back out the other.
But for people with OCD, these unwanted thoughts are sticky. They hang out and overstay their welcome until we are whipped into a frenzy of anxiety.
The important thing to realize is that these blasphemous thoughts, fundamentally, are intrusive and ego-dystonic.
They are not your own.
Therefore, we may treat them like enemy intruders and we may treat ourselves with acceptance and mercy.
What Does the Bible Say About Blasphemous Thoughts?
Perhaps you’ve gone to Google and typed in “Bible verses about blasphemy” and have been terribly discouraged by what you find.
Yes, the Bible does talk about blasphemy. But the discussion needs to take place with an understanding of of mental health, which is often not the primary focus of Bible passages.
There are two paths we can take when we ask, “what does the Bible say about blasphemous thoughts?”
The first route is to analyze passages that talk about blasphemy as ego-syntonic, chosen, willful behavior.
The second route is to analyze passage that speak to the reality of blasphemous thoughts that are ego-dystonic, alien, and unwanted.
What we find in both categories is surprising! If you’ve based your understanding of blasphemous thoughts on only one or two verses, you might be astonished to see the complexity and layers of nuance in the complete picture.
Bible Verses About Purposeful Blasphemy
Many people have the idea that “blasphemy” is the act of using a curse word against God or resisting the Holy Spirit to some kind of vague “point of no return.”
This is a constricted, incomplete picture of what blasphemy means! And because it’s such a narrow-minded definition, it seems deceptively easy to fall into by accident.
However, when it comes to willful, purposeful blasphemy, there are a number of factors involved.
- Spiritual Treason: making yourself god
- Royal Disrespect: ignoring, challenging, or showing disdain for the distinction between Creator and creature
- Idolatry and Disobedience: turning away from God
As you can see, there are multiple aspects to blasphemy. Think of “blasphemy” as another word for a coup d’état — when guerrilla soldiers come in to forcibly remove the government. Blasphemy is any human attempt to replace God — and this can manifest itself in pride, egocentrism, idolatry, cursing God, ignoring God, being disobedient, and claiming to have divine powers.
Certainly, the idea that “blasphemy” is merely cursing God or offending the Holy Spirit is a very narrow definition.
“Blasphemy” as Spiritual Treason
God is our Creator, our King, and our Lord. He’s the boss — even over those who don’t believe in Him.
Treason occurs when you try to challenge His role as boss and become the boss yourself. Lots of Bible verses refer to this.
And some of the scribes were sitting there and reasoning in their hearts, “Why does this Man speak blasphemies like this? Who can forgive sins but God alone?”
Only the King can make legal rulings to dole out justice or forgive sins. A common peasant would be out of line if he attempted to make a royal declaration. This is what the scribes assumed when they heard Jesus claiming to forgive sins. Only God can do that, they thought — so Jesus must be committing blasphemy. For them, blasphemy was a form of treason, of claiming to do something that only God could do.
A prime example of blasphemy’s “treason” is seen in the prophetic forewarnings of Revelation’s terrifying beast power — also called the “Son of Perdition” in 2 Thessalonians. This power would exalt himself as God and blaspheme His name to the point of getting everyone who is not saved to worship himself.
Blasphemy, in this usage, literally means to put yourself in God’s place.
Let no one deceive you by any means; for that Day will not come unless the falling away comes first, and the man of sin is revealed, the son of perdition, who opposes and exalts himself above all that is called God or that is worshiped, so that he sits as God in the temple of God, showing himself that he is God.
And he was given a mouth speaking great things and blasphemies, and he was given authority to continue for forty-two months. Then he opened his mouth in blasphemy against God, to blaspheme His name, His tabernacle, and those who dwell in heaven.
It was granted to him to make war with the saints and to overcome them. And authority was given him over every tribe, tongue, and nation. All who dwell on the earth will worship him, whose names have not been written in the Book of Life of the Lamb slain from the foundation of the world.
Jesus was constantly having fiascos related to blasphemy.
The things He said and did as the Son of God were appropriate — but if any other human being would have done them, it would have counted as blasphemy — treason against God. An attempt to wrest God’s throne from Him.
The Jews answered Him, saying, “For a good work we do not stone You, but for blasphemy, and because You, being a Man, make Yourself God.”
The religious leaders were upset because Jesus, whom they thought was a mere man, had seemingly crossed a line by declaring Himself one with God. Later, when standing before the court, Jesus made a similar statement which, for any other person, would have been severely blasphemous.
But Jesus kept silent. And the high priest answered and said to Him, “I put You under oath by the living God: Tell us if You are the Christ, the Son of God!” Jesus said to him, “It is as you said. Nevertheless, I say to you, hereafter you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of the Power, and coming on the clouds of heaven.” Then the high priest tore his clothes, saying, “He has spoken blasphemy! What further need do we have of witnesses? Look, now you have heard His blasphemy!
“Blasphemy” as Royal Disrespect
US President Harry Truman used to begin each day with a staff meeting at 8:30. One day during this meeting, the mail clerk brought him a lavender envelope sealed with an ornate wax seal and bound with elegant ribbons. It was a letter from King Ibn Saud of Saudi Arabia.
The letter opened with the salutation, “Your Magnificence.”
President Truman chuckled and told his staff, “I like that. I don’t know what you guys call me when I’m not here, but it’s okay if you refer to me from now on as ‘His Magnificence.’”
Some time later, President Truman worked with the UN to support the importation of 100,000 Jews into Palestine. He then received a second letter from Ibn Saud. But this time, the letter began with the simple words, “Dear Mr. President.”
Apparently, the king’s lavish respect for President Truman had its limitations!
But it leads us to a question: what is respect?
It is the appropriate response given to a person that duly recognizes his or her status and role.
As created human beings, we owe respect to God as our Creator, Lord, and King. He is the One who created us, saved us, and rules us. Though He is close and personal to each one of us, there is still an immense gap of ontological distance. God is God, and we are His servants.
Not His equals. Not His pals.
A healthy ability to distinguish between His role as king and our role as subjects will protect us from blasphemy. Today, aspects of God’s closeness have almost been overemphasized to the point of erasing the Creator-creature distinction. God is portrayed as a buddy-buddy “nice guy in the sky” and humans are said to have a “spark of divinity” within them.
This is a form of blasphemy!
The Bible has several verses that speak about blasphemy as royal disrespect. For example:
Whom have you reproached and blasphemed?
Against whom have you raised your voice,
And lifted up your eyes on high?
Against the Holy One of Israel.
This was a rebuke to Sennacherib, the king who openly challenged Yahweh’s ability to save Israel from their enemies.
Here’s another somewhat lengthy example of how blasphemy can be any form of disrespect, of lowering God’s estimate and worth, or failing to show the proper respect.
Now the son of an Israelite woman, whose father was an Egyptian, went out among the children of Israel; and this Israelite woman’s son and a man of Israel fought each other in the camp. And the Israelite woman’s son blasphemed the name of the Lord and cursed; and so they brought him to Moses. (His mother’s name was Shelomith the daughter of Dibri, of the tribe of Dan.) Then they put him in custody, that the mind of the Lord might be shown to them.
And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying, “Take outside the camp him who has cursed; then let all who heard him lay their hands on his head, and let all the congregation stone him.
“Then you shall speak to the children of Israel, saying: ‘Whoever curses his God shall bear his sin. And whoever blasphemes the name of the Lord shall surely be put to death. All the congregation shall certainly stone him, the stranger as well as him who is born in the land. When he blasphemes the name of the Lord, he shall be put to death.
Speaking vile words or curses against God is a form of blasphemy. But again, remember that we are speaking of purposeful and willful blasphemy. Later we will speak about ego-dystonic or unwanted thoughts against God. For now we are speaking only of the verses that condemn this behavior in those who are engaging in it purposefully.
“Blasphemy” as Idolatry and Disobedience
Blasphemy can be a type of spiritual treason, where you place yourself on the throne and declare yourself God.
Or it can be a form of arrogant disrespect to your Creator, either in the form of cursing, taunting, or vile speaking.
But when both of these failures are combined, the result is idolatrous disobedience.
When you are fully sold to the idea that you are the god of your own life and you no longer have respect for God’s authority, you sink into an experience of blatant disregard and sin.
“Therefore, son of man, speak to the house of Israel, and say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord God: “In this too your fathers have blasphemed Me, by being unfaithful to Me. When I brought them into the land concerning which I had raised My hand in an oath to give them, and they saw all the high hills and all the thick trees, there they offered their sacrifices and provoked Me with their offerings. There they also sent up their sweet aroma and poured out their drink offerings.
You who say, “Do not commit adultery,” do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? You who make your boast in the law, do you dishonor God through breaking the law? For “the name of God is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you,” as it is written.
It’s not hard to understand how continual disrespect and replacement of God in your life can lead to disobedience. But remember, all these verses are describing purposeful, willful choices to blaspheme (or, in the accusations against Jesus, they describe what blasphemy would look like if a normal person said some of the things that Jesus said).
What about the verses on blaspheming the Holy Spirit? Where do they fit into the discussion? Interestingly, they are also part of this category of willful, purposeful action — so let’s briefly take a look at them now.
Blasphemy Against the Holy Spirit
Jesus made a very strong statement about blaspheming the Holy Spirit. It was important enough to be recorded in all three synoptic gospels — Matthew, Mark, and Luke. And in two of these gospels — Matthew and Mark — the statement is set within a story, and the author remarks, “Jesus said this because…”
Wouldn’t you be interested to know what the “because” statement was? Me, too!
Context is so, so important.
People love to pick out verses here and there to build a case without any attention to the context. And nowhere is that more true than these scary verses about grieving the Holy Spirit (in context, they are not so scary).
Why did Jesus make these strong statements? To whom was He talking? What were they doing, thinking, or saying that provoked such a response? Does this verse even APPLY to us?
The passages that give the background story are in Matthew 12:22-32 and Mark 3:20-30. Here’s the passage from Mark:
Then the multitude came together again, so that they could not so much as eat bread. But when His own people heard about this, they went out to lay hold of Him, for they said, “He is out of His mind.”
And the scribes who came down from Jerusalem said, “He has Beelzebub,” and, “By the ruler of the demons He casts out demons.”
So He called them to Himself and said to them in parables: “How can Satan cast out Satan? If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. And if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand. And if Satan has risen up against himself, and is divided, he cannot stand, but has an end. No one can enter a strong man’s house and plunder his goods, unless he first binds the strong man. And then he will plunder his house.
“Assuredly, I say to you, all sins will be forgiven the sons of men, and whatever blasphemies they may utter; but he who blasphemes against the Holy Spirit never has forgiveness, but is subject to eternal condemnation”— because they said, “He has an unclean spirit.”
Here are a few observations from the context:
- “His own people,” that is, those who knew Jesus, His life, and the works He had done claimed He was “out of His mind.”
- They attempted to explain away His supernatural miracles by claiming He was empowered by a devil or unclean spirit.
- Their claims were unfounded on logic and were instead instigated by an unwillingness to accept Christ. Jesus was easily able to deflect their illogical arguments in His parable of binding the strong man. But this was fundamentally not a matter of logic — it was a matter of unbelief.
Think about other stories of unbelief. It is interesting that Jesus did not give this tough response to the man who asked for healing for his son. Remember, the doubting guy who said, “Lord, I believe — help my unbelief!” He was trying to believe, and Jesus didn’t bash him over the head with a threat of the unpardonable sin. He reserved this warning for those who were already hardened in unbelief.
Jesus warned them about blaspheming the Holy Spirit “because they said, ‘He has an unclean spirit.’”
Imagine how far these guys had gone. They were far more privileged than you and I in their ability to witness miracles and hear the words of Jesus. But they didn’t want to believe, and they willfully searched for excuses.
They labeled. They bullied. They manipulated.
But by all means, they had to stop their ears to the voice of the Holy Spirit!
This is when Jesus pulled out the big guns. He leveled at them the severest warning that He ever utters in Scripture. Be careful. If you continue on this path, you pass a point of no return.
Where we get confused is when we attempt to apply this warning to those who believe or are trying their best to believe. This passage simply wasn’t meant for them.
One of my Bible professors in college told a story once of a man who was very scrupulously devoted to applying every passage in Scripture to himself.
He read a verse about gluttony, so he began skipping one meal per day.
Then he read a verse about fasting, so he began skipping two meals per day.
After that, he read about self-control, and he cut down to eating only a scanty amount of food each day — a piece of fruit, a few nuts…
He became skin and bones from trying to apply everything in Scripture to himself. My professor encouraged us to use common sense when analyzing who must apply which verses to their own lives.
Not every verse in the Bible applies to you.
And if the verses about blaspheming the Holy Spirit applied to you, you would need to match a variety of qualifiers: having a blatant unwillingness to believe, seeing firsthand miracles and yet explaining them away, etc.
You would be hard-pressed to fit the same qualifiers as the people Jesus was speaking to. It is commonly said that people who are worried about having committed the unpardonable sin haven’t — simply because they’re worried about it. Despite the simplicity of this logic, it really is true.
Bible Verses About Intrusive Blasphemous Thoughts
So let’s imagine, then, that you aren’t being purposeful or willful in committing blasphemy. You’re trying hard to believe and follow God, but you get these intrusive, OCD-type blasphemous thoughts. What does the Bible say to someone like you?
There are a few verses we can use to understand this phenomenon and help you reduce your fears.
Psalm 94:11 – Thoughts Have No Power
The Lord knows the thoughts of man,
That they are futile.
If you have scrupulosity, you probably have had “thought-action fusion” to some extent.
Thought-action fusion happens when you believe that your thoughts have power to cause or prevent bad things from happening.
For example, you may believe that thinking about the color yellow will make something bad happen. Or you may believe that a sudden intrusive thought about turning your car into oncoming traffic means you are actually going to do it.
Thought-action fusion is very common for OCD sufferers. But when it comes to blasphemous thoughts, it can get even more tricky.
There isn’t anything in the Bible that tells us not to think about the color yellow. But there are passages that tell us not to blaspheme.
So, automatically, the fear of blasphemous thoughts seems so much more sensible than the fear of yellow. There is a kind of pseudo-logic that seems to add validity to these concerns about blasphemous thoughts.
But thought-action fusion pushes the boundaries.
It tells you that merely thinking such thoughts means you actually believe them. It tells you that if you have an intrusive, unwanted blasphemous thought, that you are actually a blasphemer.
Psalm 94:11 tells us that God knows our thoughts are futile. They have no power. They can neither cause evil nor prevent it. And thoughts certainly aren’t good predictors for our true spiritual condition.
If thoughts have true power, why wouldn’t murderers just think their enemies to death instead of going through the immense risk of planning and executing a crime?
If thoughts have true power, why can’t I just stay home and think a million dollars for myself rather than working?
If thoughts have true power, why can’t the cancer patient think her way to health rather than going through agonizing and expensive treatments?
Oh — what’s that? You say YOUR thoughts are more powerful than other people? That your OCD fears are strong enough to actually change reality?
Well, please do get in touch. I’d like you think a positive future for me with your powerful mind. ” />
Blasphemous thoughts are scary because they seem powerful enough to change our status from “saved,” “beloved,” “chosen by God” to the very opposite. Blasphemous thoughts, unwanted though they may be, seem to carry a power strong enough to snatch us out of God’s hand — even though Jesus declared there is nothing powerful enough to do that.
A big part of overcoming scrupulosity involves a recognition of what Psalm 94:11 says. Our thoughts are futile. They are just blinking neurons that have, at best, a weak correlation with reality.
And God knows that.
Hebrews 4:12 – God Can Judge Our Thoughts Better Than We Can
For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
Sometimes it can be very difficult to understand our own intentions.
Did we really mean to think that blasphemous thought?
Was it me, or was it my OCD?
Going back to the concept of ego-syntonic versus ego-dystonic thoughts, one of the biggest stressors for someone suffering from blasphemous thoughts is trying to figure out whether we really intended to think that thought or not.
Thankfully, the Bible says that God, through His Word, is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart. This means that He can understand our intentions way better than we can. Again, this idea is echoed in Psalm 139:
O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
You comprehend my path and my lying down,
And are acquainted with all my ways.
God doesn’t even have to try hard to understand our thoughts. He understands them “afar off.” He comprehends our behavior and the reason behind all the things that we do.
God isn’t caught in a web of trying to figure this stuff out. We are, but He isn’t.
That’s incredibly encouraging for people who suffer from scrupulosity’s blasphemous thoughts. God’s got this, even when we feel like we don’t.
How Should I Respond to Unwanted Blasphemous Thoughts?
The technical term for unwanted, distressing thoughts that just pop into your mind is called “intrusive thoughts.” If you google this term, you’ll find millions of websites on the topic. Unwanted blasphemous thoughts also fit into this category. In pursuing a way forward, it’s helpful to look at some of the general research about intrusive thoughts.
Generally, there are three main disorders that can cause intrusive thoughts:
- Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
- Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
- Post-Partum Depression
Within the broader context of psychotherapy, intrusive thoughts are typically treated with Exposure and Response Prevention Therapy (ERP). This is a type of treatment that involves getting you to face your biggest fear head-on, either through real or imagined exposure.
For example, if you have intrusive thoughts about losing control and stabbing someone with a knife, you may be asked to touch a knife or hold a knife to your therapist’s back.
This obviously will trigger your anxiety to a supremely desperate pitch. But with guided practice, repeated exposure to your fears will eventually result in a reduction of anxiety.
What does this look like for something intangible like blasphemous thoughts? Typically, ERP involves exposing yourself to these thoughts and choosing not to resist, avoid, or fight back.
Exposure Therapy for Religious Themes
For instance (I’m going to use a silly example so that I don’t trigger any readers): let’s say that Suzy is a devoted follower of the god Chemosh. She regularly gets blasphemous thoughts that urge her to say, “Chemosh is a worthless stone idol!” and, “I deny you, Chemosh!”
Suzy’s therapist may choose to guide her through ERP in one of two ways: either a DIRECT or an INDIRECT exposure, followed by an intentional refusal to respond to the anxiety.
The most intense form of ERP would be a direct sort of exposure, where Suzy is asked to say these blasphemous thoughts about Chemosh out loud and not respond to the anxiety that arises. After doing this over and over again, she no longer feels very bad when she declares that Chemosh is nothing more than a stone idol.
However, Suzy feels very uncomfortable with this kind of ERP because she feels that each time she goes to treatment, is is mortally offending her god. She knows it is helping her get better and have more emotional stability, but at what cost to her eternal future in Chemosh-land?
More than once, Suzy quits treatment and falls back into old patterns of fighting and resisting the blasphemous thoughts, which always spiral her into deeper anxiety. But the risk to her eternal welfare seems too great.
However, another option, rather than verbalizing Suzy’s blasphemous thoughts directly, is to undercut their power by indirectly exposing her to a less black-and-white worldview. This helps break the certainty addiction that most people with scrupulosity have. For example:
“Suzy, you have a recurring blasphemous thought that Chemosh is only a stone idol, is that right?”
“Yes, that’s right. It’s a horrible thought. I know it isn’t true. Chemosh is real.”
“Do you know that Chemosh is real, or do you believe it?”
“I know it! I read about Chemosh in the golden oracles of Moab.”
“But wouldn’t you agree that this is belief rather than knowledge? That every single religious person in the world bases their spiritual experience on faith in unseen realities?”
“Well, yes — I suppose so.”
“When you have that thought telling you that Chemosh is just a stone idol, what would happen if you respond by saying ‘maybe he is?’”
“I could never do that! It would be a denial of my faith!”
“Oh, hold on — hear me out. We aren’t saying that Chemosh isn’t real. We aren’t saying that he IS real. What we are saying is that we are humans and our knowledge is partial and prone to errors. There are many things about Chemosh that we don’t understand. If we claim to know everything, that would be very arrogant. How would you feel about saying, ‘I’m pretty sure that Chemosh is real, but there’s always a possibility that I’m wrong and he actually is a stone idol?’”
“That still feels terrifying.”
“I know. But does a statement like that fit in your worldview? Can you say it with a good conscience?”
“Well, I guess it would be arrogant to say that I am 100% sure…but maybe I could say that I’m pretty sure Chemosh is more than a stone idol.”
“And how does that make you feel to say that, Suzy?”
“Oh — terribly anxious!”
“But what you’re really saying is that there’s no way you can be 100% sure about anything in the metaphysical world. You accept all these things by faith but not by sight. Is that what you’re saying?”
“Yes…but! If I doubt Chemosh, I feel like I will lose eternity in Chemosh-land! I mean, I can see how what you’re saying is true, but it still gives me a lot of anxiety!”
“And what does that anxiety make you want to do?”
“I feel the need to blow air out of my mouth to expel the bad thought, and verbalize that ‘Chemosh is Lord.’”
“So these are your compulsions, right? They are actions that you feel will cancel out the bad thought?”
“So let’s see if we can go for five minutes without you blowing any air out and without verbalizing that Chemosh is Lord…and next time we will try to go for ten minutes…”
People with scrupulosity tend to see the world in severely black and white terms. Sometimes it is enough to introduce the various shades of nuance in the Bible and to lean into the mysterious, unknown, faith-based aspects of spirituality. This can do much to break OCD’s insistence on absolutes. This is what allows the religious exposure to go forward without violating your conscience.
Verbalizing your blasphemous thought can feel like a dangerous denial of your faith. But you’re making progress if you’re able to listen to that thought urging you to deny God and say, “well, I’m pretty sure that I’m on a good track to be a faithful believer till the day I die, but there’s no way of knowing 100% that I won’t deny God at some point in the future. I recognize the thought is there in my head, but I’m not going to engage with it, no matter how scary it is. It’s pointless to engage, because there simply isn’t any way to solve it to the level of absoluteness that my brain wants.”
That’s progress. When you step out of your need for absolutes and refuse to engage, you break OCD’s back. And that’s what exposure therapy helps you to do.
Exposure Therapy in the Bible
The Bible is not a book about mental health treatments. It doesn’t talk about something so modern and specific as exposure therapy. However, there are helpful principles that let us know we are on the right track.
One of my favorite stories about non-response is in the passion story. Remember when Jesus was taken before King Herod? The king was very interested in seeing Jesus because he was eager to have a miracle performed. He wanted some entertainment.
But he didn’t want truth.
No — truth had already come to Herod through the voice of John the Baptist. He had already been pricked in his heart and had refused to respond. When his adulterous affair with Herodias ended with the gruesome death of John, his guilty conscience could barely be contained.
At one point, when he heard of the miracles of Jesus, King Herod believed for a moment that it might be John the Baptist risen from the dead (Matthew 14:1-3)!
When Jesus appeared before Herod, he was appearing before a monarch who would in no way be benefited from dialogue. So Jesus did not speak. At all.
Now when Herod saw Jesus, he was exceedingly glad; for he had desired for a long time to see Him, because he had heard many things about Him, and he hoped to see some miracle done by Him. Then he questioned Him with many words, but He answered him nothing. And the chief priests and scribes stood and vehemently accused Him. Then Herod, with his men of war, treated Him with contempt and mocked Him, arrayed Him in a gorgeous robe, and sent Him back to Pilate.
Jesus was surrounded by “questioning with many words,” “vehement accusations,” “contempt,” and “mocking.” Does it sound like the voice of OCD? Certainly!
Jesus demonstrated to us that it is possible to be in the presence of intense questioning and even false statements of untruth and yet not respond. With some people (and with some mental health disorders) dialogue does no good. Response does no good.
So remain silent and let the untruths swirl around you. Keep your hands in your pockets, keep your mouth closed, and wait for falsehood to fall to the floor of its own accord.
Exposure Therapy: Lessons from the Honeybee
My dad loves bees. He’s a master beekeeper and used to be president of a statewide beekeepers association. I always used to laugh at him when I saw him suited up, but when it came to eating the honey he brought back, I retracted my laughter. Raw, freshly harvested honey is so tasty!
I never liked going with him to the hives. All those swarming insects gave me the heebie-jeebies! But bees can teach us important lessons about non-response to our OCD.
Potential Versus Actual Danger
We grow up knowing that large flying insects like bees, wasps, and hornets can sting. And many of us know from experience that these stings hurt. So when you get a bee buzzing around your head, you may get an automatic danger signal.
Oh, no! It’s going to sting me!
What most people don’t know is that honeybees can only sting once and then they die. This is because their stingers are barbed, and once they stick into your flesh, they don’t come out again. The bee flies away and the entire poison sack is ripped out of her abdomen, causing her death.
Since the bees die when stinging you, they save their stings for life-or-death situations — like protecting the hive. If you are just hanging out at a picnic table in the park and have a bee buzzing around your head, it simply means she is checking you out to see if you have any tasty pollen. Especially if you’re wearing a colorful shirt or sweet perfume, you may get lots of bee attention — but it’s typically out of curiosity, not antagonism.
You feel afraid when there is no actual danger.
The intrusive, blasphemous thoughts of OCD are very much like those buzzing honeybees. They feel dangerous but typically present no real harm. People with OCD tend to assign a lot of unwarranted power to our thoughts. We think that our thoughts are dangerous, but they aren’t. They only feel that way.
Finding Safety in Not Responding
The second OCD lesson we can take from the honeybee is the value of not responding when we feel endangered.
Just when you were about to sit down at the outdoor picnic, you hear the ominous buzz of a bee around your head. What do you do?
Well, you know what you don’t want to do. You don’t want to wildly flail your arms in defense. You don’t want to pick up a paper plate and try whacking the bee. You don’t want to do anything aggressive.
That’s a sure-fire way to get yourself stung!
Honeybees teach us that the best response is to be very still and not respond. Bees rarely sting a calm, quiet human that is not invading their territory. So from an early age, we are told “just be still!” when a bee buzzes nearby.
With the intrusive, blasphemous thoughts of OCD, the same rule applies. Fighting back against blasphemous thoughts is a sure-fire way to get yourself stuck in an endless loop of self-analysis, doubt, and ever-rising anxiety. But there is safety in not responding.
As the bee will fly away of its own accord, so will the blasphemous thought. You just have to wait for it.
Frequently Asked Questions About Blasphemous Thoughts
In the final section of this guide, I’d like to cover some of the most commonly asked questions about blasphemous thoughts. I will briefly discuss the following:
- How can I reduce my anxiety and panic while ignoring the blasphemous thoughts?
- Why do I get feelings of numbness, disconnection, depersonalization when I get blasphemous thoughts?
- What if it feels like my thoughts were really wanted and chosen?
How Can I Reduce My Anxiety and Panic While Ignoring Blasphemous Thoughts?
I won’t lie to you — riding out the wave of anxiety that comes with intrusive thoughts is tough. It really is. But it’s the only way forward.
While we intentionally ignore and refuse to respond to the blasphemous thoughts, there are two tricks that can help you reduce the anxiety. The first trick is helpful at any stage of progress, but the second trick will probably only be helpful to those who are at more advanced stages in overcoming scrupulosity.
Anxiety Reduction Trick 1: Biblical Imaging
In another post, I describe in detail how we can use a four-step process to meet, greet, label and eat our intrusive thoughts (read the article to understand what I’m talking about)!
The core of this approach involves Biblical imaging — that is, choosing a specific scene in Scripture and mentally placing yourself there. One that is very useful to riding out the anxiety of blasphemous thoughts is from Psalm 23.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
God never promised to remove the things that bother us — but He said He will prepare a banqueting table for us while our evil enemies (like intrusive thoughts) glower and lurk in the dark forest nearby.
When the intrusive thoughts press in, we imagine ourselves sitting with our Good Shepherd at this table. We imagine feasting and enjoying the blessing of His presence while the intrusive thoughts (in whatever form you imagine them) watch from nearby.
It is a way of acknowledging our intrusive thoughts without engaging with them. You see, we want to acknowledge them, because otherwise we will get into avoidance tactics. But we want to ignore them in the sense that we don’t enter dialogue. We are enjoying our feast, but they are not invited to the table.
Anxiety Reduction Trick 2: Mockery
Mockery is a powerful and often fast-acting tool against intrusive thoughts, but may not be helpful to you in the very beginning when you are still getting the hang of exposure. Try it, and if it doesn’t work so well right now, leave it aside and try again when you’ve gained some more mental muscle.
Mocking our intrusive thoughts can sometimes deliver such a powerful blow that the thoughts go away almost immediately — but like all techniques, it has its limitations and may not be appropriate for every single blasphemous thought.
Mockery is merely a way of meeting intrusive thoughts on their own ground. Intrusive thoughts are highly exaggerated and false, so we respond with even more exaggeration and falsity.
Zach has an intrusive thought telling him that he is a devil-worshipper. Whenever that thought comes to mind, Zach responds with overly-exaggerated, sarcastic rhetoric.
“I’m a devil worshipper? Why, thank you so much for reminding me! But, dear brain, you have sorely underestimated my evilness. I am not only a devil worshipper, I am a demon in disguise! Haven’t I ever showed you my pitchfork? Haven’t you seen my tail? Well, if you’ll excuse me, dear brain, I really don’t have time to chat, because I have so much havoc and destruction on my to-do list for today. Talk to you later!”
Obviously, deep down you know that none of this is true. Sarcasm deals in opposites to get a point across. Did you ever make a silly mistake and have a family member affectionately (or not so affectionately) say, “you’re a genius?”
In that moment, they were using sarcasm/mockery as a way to give a message through its opposite expression.
Mockery can be deadly to our intrusive thoughts. Try it.
Why Do I Get Feelings of Numbness, Dead Emotions, and Depersonalization When I Have Blasphemous Thoughts?
A common phenomenon experienced alongside scrupulosity’s blasphemous thoughts is a feeling of numbness. This may be numbness of the emotions, an inability to feel the heart or soul, lack of motivation, or a sense of being disconnected from the body (called “depersonalization“).
This may happen because the constant struggle against bad thoughts leads to mental and emotional exhaustion. Disconnecting may be your body’s way of gaining a temporary sense of relief after you have depleted your stores of stress chemicals.
Having intrusive, blasphemous thoughts means you’re having lots of stress chemicals like cortisol and adrenaline constantly pumping through your body. When no relief is in sight, your body and brain might work together to shut down this cycle by pulling the plug, figuratively speaking.
The experience of numbness and depersonalization is also common to people with PTSD who have experienced prolonged periods of trauma.
For example, the little girl who is growing up in a severely abusive home feels endangered and powerless (like the person with OCD). After a really long time in this environment, she will begin to have periods of depersonalization, where she feels emotionally numb, disconnected from her personality, and may have out-of-body experiences.
Your intrusive thoughts produce similar feelings of danger and powerlessness. Your numbness might be quite scary, but don’t be afraid of it. It is your body and brain cooperating together to create a safety valve to prevent things from getting out of hand.
As you learn healthier ways of preventing the OCD escalation, you will probably have less of these kinds of episodes.
What If It Feels Like My Blasphemous Thoughts Were Really Wanted and Chosen?
In an earlier section, we talked about the difference between ego-syntonic and ego-dystonic thoughts. We talked about how ego-syntonic blasphemous thoughts — thoughts that are in harmony with your ego and sense of self — are not good, but ego-dystonic blasphemous thoughts count as “intrusive thoughts” and shouldn’t be worried about.
Every scrupulous person’s biggest fear is, “what if that thought was genuinely from me?”
In other words, they fear their intrusive thought was actually ego-syntonic.
Let’s be honest here: sometimes it sincerely feels like we willfully generated a bad thought. Why in the world does this happen? And does it indicate something about our spirituality?
In another article, I talk about the OCD escalation cycle, which can often include an element of willful, desperate pseudo-agreement with our blasphemous thoughts (I say “pseudo-agreement” because it isn’t real even though it feels like it is).
Here’s the cycle in a nutshell (but head over the read the full article for more explanation):
- Triggering thought: you have an intrusive thought of a blasphemous nature. This gets your wheels rolling.
- Rumination: you overanalyze the thought, trying to figure out where it came from and what it tells you about yourself. You are starting to get a bit anxious.
- Resistance: you are sure that you don’t want or agree to this thought, so you resist it strongly. But it’s still there, so you resist harder. Your anxiety levels are escalating rapidly.
- Anger and desperation: no matter what you do, you can’t get rid of the blasphemous thought! You begin to grow angry and/or desperate. You feel as if your life forces are bleeding out of you as you pour all your efforts into avoiding the possibility that you might agree with the thought.
- Explosion: finally, you can’t take it anymore. You have been whipped into a frenzy and dangled at the edge of self-destruct for so long that you explode. You give up the struggle and “agree” to the thought.
- Mental silence: almost immediately, the emotional pitch subsides. You free-fall into mental silence so profound that you may feel numb or disconnected from your self or your soul. This stage introduces other fears that you may have committed the unpardonable sin or truly meant what you thought.
- Reconciliation: after some time, you feel a little calmer and you return to God to seek reconciliation. After this point, you may have positive spiritual experiences until the next trigger, at which point you may go through the same cycle again.
In this scenario, you did not choose your blasphemous thought. It was not ego-syntonic. Your apparent “assent” happened because of intense mental strain. It is no different than the prisoner who admits to a crime he did not do while being physically tortured.
The litmus test to know if you are a truly reprobate person or merely a scrupulous person is to ask how often you come back to God to seek reconciliation.
A reprobate will blaspheme and keep going in a godless direction without looking behind him or caring one whit about grieving the Holy Spirit.
A scrupulous person will appear to “assent” to bad thoughts but keep coming back over and over again to ask for forgiveness. She will seek reconciliation and continue trying to please God. She will mourn and feel sorry for what she thinks was a sinful thought.
Yes, you may feel that you sometimes “agree” to these thoughts, but if you keep coming back, that’s all that counts.
You’re part of God’s flock. You belong here.
Having unwanted, blasphemous thoughts is a terrifying experience, but it’s quite common to people with religious OCD. Having these unwanted thoughts is not a sin. God still loves you and He understands what you’re going through.
It is possible to get blasphemous thoughts to lose their power over you. The key lies in remembering that thoughts have no power and God understands the origins of our thoughts better than we do.
Yes, there are different methods — ERP, Biblical imaging, direct mockery — but above and beyond these methods we must remember that God is kindly and compassionately uniting with us in our efforts to get better.
He wants you to be free, just as much as he wants healing for broken legs, cancer, and depression.
As we go through the valley of the shadow of death, we may feel as though these unwanted blasphemous thoughts rob us of our eternal hopes. We may feel estranged from God and cast upon the rocks of despair. But through all this, God never leaves our side. He walks with us through the valley, well aware that our thoughts are caused by a mental disorder called OCD.
And He loves you through the fog of mental health. Because He sees the real you.
Dear friend, don’t give up. Your blasphemous thoughts don’t define you. You are beloved by God, and no thought that pops into your mind will ever be powerful enough to reverse His love for you.
Drop me a comment if you have any questions. I usually answer within a few hours. Also, let let me know how you’ve seen God become more real to you through your struggle with scrupulosity!
Best wishes on the journey,
I have struggled with this since high school. I am so glad to have found your article. This problem has in part, kept me away from church and from seeking a deeper relationship with God. It helps to know others have this problem too. I could never talk to anyone about it because I was so ashamed. I have some hope now that things will get better. Thank you.
I’m Leah and i’m 15 years old and I’m struggling with scrupulosity. Thank You Jesus for this article, this has given me a bigger idea and some comfort in knowing that others struggle with this and it is something that can be overcome. I just wanna thank you for the information and examples of this topic because i was in a pit and i didn’t know what was going on or what to do, but this helped.
Thank you so much,
In desperation last night: over the “:Did I mean that blasphemous thought ? Does this thought mean I have a heart problem ( spiritually speaking of course) issues, I asked Jesus to test my heart like he did with Peter when he restored him to ministry. And today he did! Was it fun? No way! But lab work is never fun.
Well tonight when a thought came up I was able to laugh and say um I apologize for that thought that just popped into my head so I’m going to just put this jar of peanut butter or creepy looking toy snake that I don’t want to buy back on the shelf or just throw it out of my cart across the store! Nope not mine! Not buying that! Lol
So cool, I love that!
God bless you Jaime. You have helped me so much with your webpage.
Lots of Love
Thank you so much for this. This started and immediately got worse when I decided I wanted a closer relationship with God. I literally felt like I was losing my mind, and was starting to feel very depressed and hopeless. Like there’s no point in living if I’ve lost eternity. I began feeling like God doesn’t want me anymore, and that He’s abandoned me because even when I would pray, I would fall back into the same pattern. At some point, I felt that God had broken my heart and rejected me. I had been feeling numb and removed from myself for some time, and like everything is pointless. Even my diet and sleep has been poor. I have cried more tears since this began more than I remember crying in my whole life.
I’m so glad I found this when I did. This gives me hope that it’s not too late. God is our strength and hope. May God continue to bless you.
Hi, i wish i could sound enthusiastic but ive been feeling very down due to unwanted thoughts about God, ive been dealing with these for almost a month now, i had repented 3 years ago and its been all good until now, i started reading the bible, praying, and wanting to be closer to god. ive gotten all these nasty thoughts about god, from : "Im god, Im better than Satan, I dont want to be with God, or what if i dont want to be saved or there is no savior or god is real or i want to be with satan" its gotten to the point where im starting to think these really are my thoughts. its gotten to the point where im afraid im not gonna be able to go back.. im starting to feel emotionless and im scared. i dont want to turn away from god, i know im not any of those things, i am nothing without god, god is god and no one can take his place… it just really hurts and im scaerd im gonna come to a point where i dont want to be with god anymore..im not as emotional when i think about these thoughts as i used to be… i dont know what to do and im scared. ive rebuked in Jesus's mighty name and ive prayed for God to take them away… what if i have committed the unforgivable sin?… what if i will commit it? i do not want to go to hell or be without god.. im scared im really worried about damning myself to hell because of this… i feel so lost and empty, im really scared, i just wish i could love god in peace and not have these disturbances, ive talked with my therapist, psychologist, and a spiritual advisor and my parents.. im afraid it just keeps coming back and i dont know what to do, ive had thoughts of suicide or "If i had been gone a year ago i wouldnt be in this position." even starting thinking about writing a suicide note to my family… i dont want to commit the unforgivable sin.. im scared. im scared of being numb and just allowing these thoughts while not being emotional about them. i dont know what to do anymore.
I can only say you are not alone.
I've struggled with these thoughts for almost 20 years. Since I was a young child. thoughts would enter my mind to openly reject God or to "trample on the blood" of Christ or to place myself in the position of those who "crucified Christ a second time" for whom there is no forgiveness…
My mind would then immediately accuse me of going too far, being rejected from salvation, and tell me to thrown in the towel. I think about Job sometimes, because my thoughts would then often go "If you just curse God and die, you'll KNOW where you stand and won't have to keep up this fight".
Almost 20 years. But its only been recently that I actually started seriously seeking help. I hid these thoughts from nearly everyone and struggled with them and internalized them for nearly two decades thinking I could just make them go away or outlast them.
I'm learning that God's Word is a powerful tool against them. I've taken to quoting scripture, or even speaking to my thoughts instead of "mocking" them per-say.
I'm resistant to the idea of exposure therapy to some extent. Maybe I don't understand it, but there's no way I will willful curse or blasphming or rejecting out-loud the Holy Spirit with my mouth. Perhaps exposure therapy is more along the lines of acknowledging these thoughts, but not actually agreeing with them? I'm not sure. A little confused on that point. All I know is they come at me nearly ever minute of every day for decades. To the point that I've learned to "turn down the volume" where its like a quiet radio playing on loop in the background of my thoughts. Only coming to the forefront if I'm stressed or confused or frustrated most of the time. Then I get a strong urge to vehemently deny any intention or agreement with the thought, even as it continies cycling like a chant in my head.
I don't have answers for full solutions to this but I AM confident that our God is bigger than our own minds and failures. Psalms 94:17-19 is true for me. Holy Spirit is and has been this entire time my keeper, and my comfort, even after I get snapped out if a cycle of thinking to curse or reject or blasphem Him. It feels like I'm constantly fighting myself. But take comfort in knowing He sees you, and He is much bigger than your thoughts and fears.
Going through a very hard time. God has given me in site through His Word but still having difficulty. I have OCD as a child used to do rituals to calm them. Called upon Jesus many years ago. I still struggle as I have more time on my hands I was able to beat the physical rituals touching, counting things like that.
Same. same. I too had physical rituals. had to touch certain things or fixated on certain numbers. Like I had to tap a table 7 times. weird stuff like that.
You are not alone.
hi am harsh
i have ocd and i have a bad thought. when i have a bad thought i deal with god opposite of thought . I don't know why
suppose i have thought about that if i eat this i can wrong or (sexual thought ) with god then i pray and said that if i not eat then it is happen
but some time its can be hard for me when i not fulfill the deal with god and i afraid that god will punish because i said or deal with god
i am in very trobule plesae help i love god
Hello harsh. First of all you are precious to our Lord and savior. He knows you love Him, and HE loves you. These intrusive thoughts are not your true heart, God knows your true heart for Him. What has helped me recently with this is I was prayed for in church and the pastor asked the members of my church, if any one here feels the battle in your mind so much you feel your mind is going to explode step forward. Well many stepped forward and the pastor said, see you are not alone. All of God's children experience intrusive thoughts and battles in our mind. I just recently laid it all down at Jesus feet and asked Him to take all of it, the burden of it. He took it all on the cross and washed you clean. God is a just God but He is also a loving understanding Father who fully understands the battles in our mind. We all must understand and believe and know that it is all forgiven by the blood of Jesus. Father in heaven in Jesus name, I pray for peace and a clear mind over harsh, and please take this burden and battle from harsh, in Jesus name I ask and pray amen.
I sometimes get evil thoughts about God what I mean is sexual thoughts about God. The more I tried to get away from it the more it pops. I think that Iam lost etrnally having no hope. Will this kinds of din be forgiven
Anuraj, God bless you precious child of God. God will never leave you nor forsake you. His words are truth. He never changes or goes back on His word. He loves us so much He sent His precious son to die for you. Believe and trust in Him. All of your sins are forgiven and washed clean by the blood of Jesus. our Lord knows your true heart, He can discern between intrusive thoughts and your true heart for Him. He understands the battles in our minds. Lay this burden down at His feet, asked Him to heal your mind. I have been asking the Holy Spirit to heal my mind and to change my thinking and my mind has been clear, more clear than it has been in a long while. I have peace in the knowledge that I am forgiven fully and God knows my true heart. Anuraj, I pray for joy in your life, peace over your mind and healing from God. I pray for your mind to be released from this burden, in Jesus name I pray amen.
First I would like to pray for healing and restoration of mind over everyone who reads this. our Father in heaven in Jesus name I pray for healing over all who read this. It is so true that God knows all our true hearts for Him. a few years ago I went through a severe depression, and was experiencing this before and during the depression. I am much better now, GOD has been restoring my mind. I was still getting this here and there recently, then I was prayed over at church recently and then I ran across this article. I truly believe that the Lord put this in my path to understand this condition, at the time of the depression I did not know what it was. I was absolutely horrified that it could be my thoughts about my Savior and Lord. The fear was debilitating and it was the main reason I fell into a depression. my mind just could not take it. Now I understand that it is not my thoughts, it is the condition and that God understands. Nothing will ever snatch us from our Father's hand. just the fact that we agonize and worry over this shows we are children of GOD, i truly believe the Lord spoke to me through this article. Jesus took it all on Himself, let it go and lay it on Him. God bless you all and see you in heaven!
I would add, in my own experience anyway, certain bad habits can contribute to these sorts of things.
I struggled with pornography for years. I was unable to pull away from it, or rather I was not fighting with the Word of God and just content to wallow in the filth of those sins for far too long.
Proverbs 28:13 Has been healing for me on this issue. And while I still have significant struggles with depression and horrifying thoughts, the Spirit of God has been strongly working with me to break off immorality and pornography addictions in my life. With that, I believe I've had a noticeable improvement in my overall peace of mind.
So for those reading, I am suggesting that if you struggle with depression and anxiety and unwanted thoughts and ALSO indulge in sins of immorality, confess those sins to a brother or sister in Christ who you trust, and forsake the sin. Get help, counseling, whatever you need to do. But seek to break from those sins as I am convinced they contribute powerfully to keeping you in a place of anxiety and depression.
Thank you for this lesson,,I was terrified with my thoughts before reading this,,
Hi I've been struggling with this for almost a year I've been struggling with really bad intrusive negative unwanted disrespectful thoughts about god Jesus christ and the virgin mary and i feel really really awful because my intrusive thoughts are very offensive and have swear words foul language and I'm really scared that i hurt their feelings and there mad at me i pray forgiveness but the thoughts just won't go away and i really wish it would as well as the voices in my mind and I'm really scared and mad that I have to have this.
I've got the same problem.
Is there anything you found that works for you.?
unfortunately I have not and I'm kinda worried I'm not sure whether this is ocd or schizophrenia but i just wanna stop having intrusive negative unwanted thoughts and forget i had them and be good
Matthias, a few years back I had a mental breakdown due to this condition. severe depression. I had been doing much better then some of it started rearing its ugly head. Well just this week I have been doing fantastic. I was prayed over at church and I have finally started to understand fully what it means to lay the battle and all the burdens at Jesus feet. And this is a battle for sure. I asked the Holy Spirit to change my thinking to renew my mind. I finally understand what it means to fully trust that all is forgiven. You are precious to our Lord and savior. He knows your heart my friend. I pray for your mind to be released from this condition, I pray for Jesus to take this from you and I pray for peace over you in Jesus name I pray amen.
Jared, I have struggled with this also. I had a mental breakdown due to this issue. But I am doing fantastic now. Just recently I was prayed over at church and this last week my mind is clearer than it has been in along time. I asked God to heal my mind, change my thinking and I have finally grasped what it means to lay all of this at the feet of Jesus. I know that is why my mind completely cleared, because I let it all go and trusted God's word. He took all of our burdens and battles and sins on the cross. This battle is not yours its His. He can discern between intrusive thoughts and your true heart, He is Almighty God and He loves you more than you know. You are so precious to HIM. I pray in Jesus name for healing, peace and for God to take this burden from your mind. I pray for you to know that God is not mad at you, He wants you to trust Him to take it all. God bless you.
Thank you so much for this! My Struggle with Unwanted intrusive thoughts ( since September 2022) has strengthened my relationship with Christ, it has been revealed to me just how real spiritual warfare is. These thoughts did not begin until I stopped living for the world and Started living for God. Since then I’ve become a threat and the enemy is trying to dim my light. Knowing that the enemy has to ask for permission before attacking me brings me hope. I know that sounds kind of weird, but what that tells me is that God sees something in me and he trusts me to get through this. Which is a huge compliment when I’m feeling defeated. There’s a reason we are told to keep fighting the good fight of faith.
Thank you for describing my situation! I needed to hear this so bad! I can’t believe this is real and this condition actually has a name. I thought i was the only person in this world going through this. Been suffering for a month after some “trauma” that happened. Thank you agin, may God Bless you!
hi my name Silvestar i have these unwanted blasphemous thought it started on this year from 5 January till now i have been struggling i seek reassurance from my friends i try to stop them but I cannot I try and try but I feel exhausted it effect my everyday life and I can do anything I just try my Saviour and I hope I would get freedom oneday and I hope God is always on time
what would I do I have an exam next month but I can concentrate to my studies
Silves, I understand your situation completely. I was in the same boat a few years ago. The thoughts would come, I thought it was my thoughts. I would try to get rid of them but they just got worse until I became very ill. I started getting better after going to church and being prayed over. Well it started rearing its ugly head again and I ran across this article. Now I understand the condition, not my thoughts intrusive thoughts. We all who struggle with this are in a battle. just this week I have a clearer mind than I have had in a long time. I was prayed over at church and I finally understand what it means to lay it all down at Jesus feet and trust it all to him. I asked the Holy Spirit to renew my mind and give me peace and I believe I have been healed and released from this. I pray for you to be healed from this, I pray for peace and renewal of mind over you in Jesus name I pray amen.
Thank you so much for this. I was having terrible, sexual, blasphemous thoughts and thought I was either possessed or crazy. Not so sure I'm happier that I can't just cast out a spirit to stop this but at least I know I'm not alone and it's not really me!
Hello and Thank you so much! I've been seeking the Lord about the repetitive thought I have that says (four letter word) the Holy Spirit. It started after a very big attack of the enemy and death of my Dad.
I needed this article! Now I picture the thought looking at me from a dark forest while I eat and laugh with the Holy Spirit in His Light and I respond back with mockery saying yes that and I will have the most beautiful intimacy and be the Bride of Christ.
These thoughts would come during sincere prayer and hinder them. It was breaking my heart. I'm happy I searched this topic and found your article. I have struggled with PTSD after a 6 hour attack in my 20s. I don't know if that has anything to do with it. I Appreciate you!
Thank you Jamie, this is helpful, but I’m finding it’s dangerous reading about forms of scrupulosity that I don’t (yet) have, because some of the horrors I’m reading here might give me ideas! Like saying, don’t think about an elephant! 🐘
In medieval times priests used to ask their flock whether they did or thought this or that perverse thing, and ended up with them having problems they never even knew about before!
I couldn’t cope with the stone idol, was it Camosh? I’d rather settle my fears by finding all that scripture says about something and hopefully finding safety in balancing that, rather than asking how certain I am something is true, and becoming comfortable with that. That feels like quenching the Holy Spirit. No I need to know whether I’ve even recognised the holy Spirit, and if it’s not him then I can ignore more easily. How is it good to ignore one’s conscience? It can only be ok if you’ve first calibrated it against solid biblical truth and then decide whether you can trust your conscience. I need the “yes, buts” answering and putting to bed!
I’ve also found it useful to be told I am 99% hard on myself (by a counsellor) because that sort of gave me permission to dare to calm down a bit.
Hi. I've been struggling with this for weeks after going through a very difficult and stressful season of my life. I believe God answered all my prayers during that time, but these intrusive thoughts still came up. I've felt so guilty and ashamed ever since it's been happening. Today I prayed that He would help me and guide me to His Word and the passages in this article have helped put my mind at ease. I had never read them before today. I want to publicly thank God, the Holy Spirit, for bringing me here. And I want to thank you for writing this article. If it's not too much trouble, I'd like to request a quick prayer for myself and everyone else who's been having these unwanted thoughts.
Thank you again and God bless you!
My name is Oje possible i have been suffering this unwanted blasphemous thoughts for so many years. This was caused and triggered by dream I had some time ago. And i had many people dreaming of me dying. And recently i had series of dreams of death Thus making me so afraid. As i m feeling numbness with severe depression. I really wish to divine encounter with God Almighty.
I sincerely need help please.
Hi Sister. Am i think in a very severe stage of this scrupulosity. I need help. The horrible blasphemous thoughts are ongoing constantly. My head is spinning at 120 mile per hour. I feel hopeless and helpless.. The thoughts are against the Holy Spirit . I am so desperate
I had those too. Derek Prince has a very good deliverance ministry on YouTube. I said one of his prayers out loud and it helped. Fasting helped. This article also helped. Try going into a vision or picture in your mind the second you know the thought is coming. Imagine the thought in darkness observing you and the Holy Spirit together in Peace and Freedom. Also try agreeing with the thought in sarcasm and mocking it. Many Blessings and Healing to you in Jesus name
I’ve been really struggling with this issue recently. I was under attack with these thoughts regarding the unpardonable sin recently, and they freaked me out. It’s like the minute I understand that sin, my obsession takes hold of it and I get bombarded by awful, unwanted blasphemous thoughts. I recently came under attack and for a second, it’s like I actually thought one. I didn’t really want to. I certainly don’t agree with that thought AT ALL. I would never want to say something so awful about my Lord. I don’t understand how it even happened. It makes no since because it’s so against what I want to do. I just don’t understand….. Please help me. I’m terrified and am in desperate need of help.
Also, are there any online support groups for this topic?
So sorry to hear that you’ve been struggling lately. And of course, I will mention (as you can see others saying in the many comments here) that the very nature of intrusive thoughts is that we don’t WANT them. God very much understands the way obsessive-compulsive brains work, and He will not only help us cope but He also doesn’t hold it against us.
Yes, there are some options for online support for scrupulosity.
The IOCDF (International OCD Foundation) has a recent emphasis on religious OCD, and they have an online group that meets I think once or twice per month. This is a free group and I believe it is mostly focused on raising awareness for religious OCD and giving a safe space for people to share their struggles and be heard.
Facebook has some excellent and free support groups for scrupulosity. Just check and make sure you choose one that is “private” so that your blasphemous thoughts don’t accidentally appear on your friends’ feeds!! 😀 In the past I was very helped in Facebook groups.
We also have a bi-weekly Zoom support group in connection with my Scrupulosity Academy, which is a paid-access membership to access an 8-hour master class, worksheets, and Zoom sessions that meet every Sunday and Wednesday. You can click on the home page and scroll down for more info on that. It’s a very sweet and supportive group with amazing people who could have written your message for themselves.
If you’re looking for one-on-one support, you can also consider getting therapy from an OCD specialist on the NOCD app. It can be tricky to find a provider who is Christian or who shares your religious beliefs, but if you do it’s great, because NOCD is often covered by health insurance.
Anyways, those are a few options that come to mind. Hope something will work out for you. Would love to have you in our group!
this is me to the T bigtime I can't even enjoy my relationship with Jesus cus of it wonder if I was even saved it came over 20 something yrs ago after I asked Jesus in my life save me right after it all started I still engaged in sin I acknowledge I did how did the door open I've prayed all thru the years God please remove this from me He hasn't why I have borderline personality disorder and regular OCD what I wrong with me I want the real truth of what He thinks and feels about this
hello, i wanna seek advise. I really want to repent from this scrupulosity but i feel like overtime, my thoughts gets worse, to the extreme that I'm starting to think I've done worse than the scribes and the pharisees. what must i do? i feel numb, I've been thinking on consulting an spiritual adviser or a priest and seek psychological help. but I'd like to talk with someone like you about this.
I feel like I'm not sure what are my thoughts and what are intrusive thiughts any more. I'm scared im going to think something that will prove I was never saved in the first place.
Hello, good morning, I have blastsphemous thoughts. Saying in my mind lord satan or father satan. Or just the word satan makes me get anxiety.it like constant thoughts especially when I pray.
Um, I have OCD, and thank you for making this article. I have fought with blasphemous thoughts for many months now and I need your help. Because my thought patterns are based on blasphemous thoughts and it's difficult to ignore them. I always responded to the blasphemous thoughts and the cycle repeats. I know I shouldn't react to it yet it's really hard for me to ignore it. what should I do?
THANK YOU GREATLY FOR THIS INFORMATION. I HAVE EPILEPSY AND HAD A UNHAPPY HOME LIFE PLUS CHURCHES THAT TAUGHT MUCH CONFUSION AND FEAR. NOW AGE 65 HAVE GONE TO MANY COUNSELORS AND IN FEAR OF DEMON POSSESSIONS. I HAVE ALWAYS HAD FEAR OF COMMITING THE UNPARDINBAL SIN AND NOW WORRIED OF DEMON POSSESSIONS . AGAIN, THANK YOU!DO YOU HAVE ANY ADVICE ON DEMON POSSESION, ? AS YOU SAID I ALWAYS LOOK FOR INFO. YOU ARE WONDERFUL!
I feel like I don’t have ocd. But the thoughts just come and stick. Is that ocd? I never have had that before, and never was like this. I had dreams I was possessed etc when I had derelizationx it’s the worse feeling ever. I feel like the thoughts aren’t mine because I love god and Jesus. Please help ! What do I do!!
Wow I feel like a relief man wow thank you very much now I will never let the devil control me again iJN amen
I have religious OCD (Scrupulosity) I have obsessions concerning: my salvation and Hell. I have constant intrusive thoughts that cause me fear and distress. I would have to write book to describe the scope of my scrupulosity and the terror and misery it causes me. Reading the Bible brings no comfort and makes it even worse. I am exhausted emotionally and physically. I am depressed and unable to enjoy even innocent entertainment like certain TV shows that make me laugh or books with intriguing plots and characters. I feel frozen – every decision I make takes on tremendous moral implications. I force myself to go to church and Bible studies and Sunday school but all these trigger the intrusive thoughts or bring back my obsessions to the forefront of my mind. Even though I know this is all completely irrational (in the last, tiny sane corner of my mind, I know it) I cannot allow myself to trust that rational part of my mind. I seldom go out and I have no close friends because I am afraid of being unable to hide my scrupulosity attacks. In church, I experience a feeling of being “different” and that I don’t. “belong.” I frequently experience what you referred to as numbness, dead emotions, and depersonalization when I am obsessing or when an intrusive thought materializes all of which contributes to the sense of not living at all but rather just existing.
I have blasphemy thoughts the whole time including the f word- I don’t want them! How can I stop them! I need more advice from you please, this article was so helpful I need more please!
Hello, my name is Ivan , I’ve been dealing with doubt for some reason which I can’t understand why myself, most likely cause I’ve been chasing after the feeling of my Holy Spirit . When I gave myself to the Lord Jesus Christ, I felt like the heart of the Holy Spirit ? If that makes sense and always have felt it. I’ve done sins willfully too , I have asked God for forgiveness. I have felt my heart hardened so much, it really is a horrible feeling. And my spirit quenched like I hear him less and less. It’s gotten to the point where I began to overthink and literally would feel condemnation and make me believe that I had desires of other stuff and make my question am I really like that ? And I accepted it for a while and it brought me more fear and I would avoid looking at almost anyone. It wasn’t until I finally understood now, it is not true. It’s all lies, more forward I still kept going to my feelings. It then led to more bitterness, pride you can say since I kept following my feelings. And eventually it led to me saying blasphemous stuff ! I’ve cursed and said horrible things and felt bad after . And I don’t agree with these thoughts and i don’t want to accept they are my thoughts, but I feel like they really come from me since it seems to come from my negative thinking but not sure, it led to me confessing every time, but as of now, I feel when these things come out or if I happen to remember did I confess it, I start to remover the stuff again, and I feel my Holy Spirit get bothered. But yeah I’ve said horrible stuff like some comments on here would say. And I end up confessing, it’s gotten to the point where I am scared to read the Bible like parts of it cause I am afraid of seeing myself not having salvation of just seeing the words of the evil one. And stuff like that, but I keep telling myself God did not give us a spirit of fear.
I do get bothered cause when a bad thought comes out, i haven’t confessed it, cause I don’t want to put more fuel to it. They are things I’ve previously confessed and Told Jesus Christ about it. Also my anxiety, every time it’s like my anxiety/fear kicks in when I talk to Jesus , my head would then go somewhere else like to the “evil one” and then I’d try shaking my head or confess to Jesus and tell Jesus Christ “I am only praying to you and no one else I am so sorry and I hate this that I can’t just talk to you without my head wondering off please forgive me”, it has gotten to the point where there is trying to be more doubt in many areas, but I know God in heaven is all powerful. Typing this comment was difficult as I am trying to keep my mind focused on it and not wondering off somewhere else. But I want the same feeling of loving God, I do love him and it feels weird , I feel numb , I want the same desire of serving the True Living God in heaven, and like reopening my heart, mind and soul . All of it , I pray to him, but I think I understand, aside from that I don’t even know if I happen to have a bad thought so I confess it again? Or if I happened to remember did I say that? Do I confess it again to God even though I’ve confessed it already ? I need help
so… I was tired of these intrusive thoughts and the more I tried to avoid them, the more they came. So I started to try a method of ignoring them but the problem is that I think when I first tried this method, instead of ignoring the thought I think I ended up thinking purposefully just to not have any compulsion or attempt to avoid it. I know that at many times the thoughts really seem purposeful and are not, but technically I think it was voluntary. I must ask forgiveness?
and what worries me is because this thought was almost similar to that passage of the Pharisees and the unpardonable sin
I’m in a similar boat I think I probably lost my salvation when I thought something on purpose to try to make it less scary. I didn’t mean the words but it seems like I am in a horrible situation spiritually I hope not but it definitely appears that way
Hi, my name is Garrett Lay amd I have been suffering from spiritual OCD for years which is weird because in almost everything else in my life I am most definitely not OCD. Before I read your article here I was suffering from these intrusive thoughts of cursing the holy spirit and then almost immediately I am rushed with anxiety and fear that I had thought I committed the unpardonable sin while simultaneously fighting and rebuking the thought verbally and within my head. Then I get numb and feel like God has left me, which I know is not true but can't help the feeling. Then I Pray to God for forgiveness and tell Him how much I love Him and that I can't stand these thoughts. I didn't know that this was a thing. I thank you for describing this for me and helping me to not feel like a monster that is dammed for hell. But it seems as though I have been dealing with this since I first came to Christ when I was around 12. I have gone through stages in my life where I have gotten so exhausted from it that I would stop praying for some period of time because I thought I was dammed anyway, the thoughts wouldn't come but because I belong to the father my spirit would desire that closeness with God and I would put more emphasis on my relationship with Christ and once I did the intrusive thoughts would becoming back in some form or fashion. I think you doing this is the first step in me healing from this, so if there are any other tips you would recommend I am open ears! God bless you!
Brother I had no idea others were going through the exact same thing that I have been through such as yourself. It has been happening to me for years and I have been in anxiety and fear over this to the point that I thought I would instantly die because of it.I am so happy to finally see that I am not alone that there is hope.Please stay strong and remember that God loves you always as do myself and your other brothers and sisters in Christ 🕊🙏🏻🕊🙏🏻🕊
Thank you, so much for the understanding. I have been battling these thoughts since 2 years they will leave and come back. Days and nights I will just break down and be lonely don’t want to do nothing but cry and worrying. I worry so much that anxiety will kick in and my headache will start. I love God with all my heart and pray for forgiveness of my sins. How can I let these go with thoughts go?
Thank you for the advise, I feel like maybe I can conqour these thoughts I’m in Zimbabwe and into ministry but the thoughts kept creeping into my head to curse the name of God. I keep speaking the name of Jesus each time they popped up. I almost went insane over it felt discouraged to do persue the work of God. And would feel my heart beating very fast sweating with my mind almost shutting on me. But I also wish to erase the thought completely and. I am so in love with My Father.
Okay so I got demons casted out of me and for the most part that helped the thoughts. Well, tonight I had a thought I renounce christ and I think it did because I felt fire in me and now I'm worried the demons are back in me and I'll be 7 times worse off than before. Did I renounce Jesus? Can I do that with my brain?
I cannot say this with 100% certainty, as I have not made a representative statistical sampling of the broader scrupulosity community, but in the cases that I have seen, intrusive thoughts were not related to demonic possession. Not in any single case. I am sure there can be elements of spiritual warfare involved, as in many of the other problems of life, but OCD is not demonic possession, it is a scientifically studied phenomenon of the human brain, which can sometimes interfere with the way we experience our faith and spirituality.
I think this would be a more helpful paradigm to operate from, unless there are clear markers of demonic involvement (intrusive thoughts do not count).
I got baptised a few years ago, but fell into issues, till I got saved in 2020 – total overnight freedom from my alcohol dependency. I've struggled with these thoughts since. I keep just accepting they're me. The other night I remembered a true believer couldn't possibly commit the unforgiveable, and that took soooo much weight off. But then I started doubting salvation and have thoughts of unbelief. All I've wanted to do was love, serve, and walk close with the Lord, as I've seen with others.. but I'm so so so so close to giving up. in fact, I already think I've checked out mentally. Don't feel anything. Convictions, awareness. Nada. Yesterday thoughts started coming in blaspheming Him through my friends. I don't feel repentant so to speak, but I say sorry. I feel very sad and hopeless inside. Lack of interest in everything. It's a shame all the prophetic words spoken over me won't happen.
Don’t forget: the period of apathy happens to everyone who struggles with intrusive thoughts. It’s the brain’s shutoff mechanism. Think of it like the way your car shuts down when it’s overheating. 🙂 It will still work once you get it cooled down. This is not a spiritual thing, this is a brain thing. You’d shut down and go apathetic even if you were dealing with intense, repetitive, inescapable intrusive thoughts about pink bunnies. The brain is just saying, “hey, let’s take a cool down period for a while.” Don’t give up, you’ll be alright.
I am on the same boat Amy, right now, I feel so low, my Holy Spirit is griefed and my heart is hardened ! I feel so low, I want the same love and passion for the Lord in Heaven! I hate these thoughts , i just want to be close to feeling the love of Jesus Christ the passion of serving him, and the love and everything ! I feel like I am blinded or something
I just want to say thank you for this article. I have struggled with blasphemous thoughts for years, since becoming a Christian. They have dogged my life so much that they have made me quite unwell.
This article has been such a relief to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and may you continue in God's blessings reaching people like me.
Thanks so much for this article I’ve been experiencing this for some years now but reading your article today has given me a sense of relief.God bless you.
Oh my! Oh my! Next to the Bible, this has been the best thing I've ever read. This article brought me to tears. I can't believe how accurate you are on how I feel. I've been in church for years and I never heard of Spiritual/OCD, blasphemous or intrusive thoughts. I had no idea what was wrong with me. Your article was soooo detailed and well written. I thank God that I found this article. It must have been God reassuring me that He understands what I'm battling mentally. You have given me hope. I believe my OCD stems from fearful teaching and biblical beliefs. I try hard to live right and please God, that it's affecting me in a bad way. I've never fully grasp the love, mercy, grace, understanding, and compassion of God. My pastors talked about hell, church rules, and sin. Those 3 topics are real but I'm a person who needs to be reaffirmed of God's love for me and that He's truly for me. I constantly feel like I have to work to keep my salvation. I'm scared to rest in the love of God as if He may fail me. Starting this Wed Nov 3, 2021, I'm going to have bi-weekly meetings with a pastor so he can help me better understand God's unconditional love for me. I'm still amazed how on point your article is. Thank you soooo much for taking the time to write it. I'm guessing God may have allowed you to deal with Blasphemous thoughts so that you could relate to people like me. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I pray that some day I'll be able to helps others.
Hi there… well I had a terrible experience where I was going back and forth with always believing I had done the unpardonable sin. (Blasphemy towards god). I was raised as a catholic yet had a family member introduce me to christianity. Started digging into it and loved it. Followed it. Anyhow little did I know that I will be challenged so badly religiously that it nearly killed me. I met a muslim person and always thought as long as people respect each others religions theres no problems. To make story short I ended up in the hospital for some time and had decided that because my believe of god has always been strong I will let myself be admitted to hospital because he will rescue me and he did. I have a 3 years old by the way. Anyhow I came out stronger and renewed. Just like mentioned in the bible about the eagles. But i had a similar breakdown and this time i feel like my fear has come true. Going through all that experience and seeing so many religious views I started digging further and that cause me what I'm stuck in now. Cant do anything but cried and feel guilty about .myself that it washed away my renewal spirit. I picked up where I had left off. My ego was hurt. I ended up in a state of vulnerability and I ended up in changing my beliefs because someone had presented me with some facts. I even had installed an app that made me feel good inside and because I felt I would be disrespectful to that person I rejected the word I had installed on my phone of god in the bible. It sounded and they ask me what's that and I said nothing. That's one the other one was I went into extreme into changing being a Christian into converting and saying out loud what they wanted to hear. I told them I wasn't ready yet they said no you are ready. And I ended up saying out loud what it's called convert to their religion muslim. And I didnt even know anything of their book nor I know much of bible but I only know I have a lot of faith in jesus but they made me doubt my faith and even made me take action. Help I'm in so much pain after that. I dont feel my soul or my heart.
Honey, God allows U-Turns, He really does. Your strong faith in Jesus is a sign that God is working in you. Do not beat yourself up nor allow the devil, fear, and condemnation beat you up. We're Christians, not because we're perfect but we believe and follow Christ. The same way you changed your mind from Christianity to Muslim, you can change your mind back. Instead of taking this lesson as a failure, learn from it. First, you need not to over analyze the Bible & Christianity. Our relationship with Christ is based on our faith and our relationship with Him. Read the Bible to learn more about God and His desire for how we should live, don't overthink it. God is your Heavenly Father, Friend, & Counselor. You can talk to Him about ANYTHING. He encourages us to cast ALL of our cares upon Him. The making of a true relationship with Him is us being Open & Honest about the good, bad, and ugly. God is not afraid of our ugly. If you no longer want to be a Muslim and desire to return to following Jesus, I encourage you to do so. Be open and honest with God about the whole situation and tell Him that you want to serve only Jesus. The second lesson for you to learn is that you need to ask God to help you to be bold about your beliefs, You sound like you may be kind of young, maybe under 35 years old. If so, you're still learning how to be comfortable with being true to yourself. Heck, you're still learning you. As you get older you'll become more comfortable in your own skin and beliefs. NEVER let anyone convince you to believe something you don't truly want to believe. Don't give into peer pressure. You are correct, people can have different religious beliefs, and get along as long as you're both respectful of each other beliefs. Remember, as a Christian, it's not your job to argue your beliefs. If a person want to sincerely know about Jesus then share your faith but if a person wants to argue religious beliefs end the conversation. Be true to You. We walk by faith not feelings. You may not feel God, but He is still with You. As believers, we'll make lots of mistakes/sin because we're still learning and growing. Don't let your feelings guide you but your faith. Read scriptures about God's desire to reconcile us to Himself. Jesus died so we can be reconciled to God. Sounds like by FAITH (not feelings) you need to reconcile to Jesus and don't allow anyone move you again. Don't expect a feeling or rapid spiritual recovery. Everyday just whisper small prayers to God, read your Bible, go to church, and with faith tell yourself… it won't always be like this. You said God healed you once before, He'll do it again…give it time. You're ok Honey. You're just a Christian in working process.
Thank you so so so much for this article I have Bipolar Disorder and for the last few days I have been cursing God Jesus and the Holy Spirit in my mind.Has a deeply committed Christian Bishops daughter I have been dismayed shocked at my thoughts and have prayed read the bible talked to God begging for forgiveness reading your article has really encouraged me as well as doing the quiz and I may even sign up for your Zoom class.
Please pray for me I love the Lord and this has been an frightening experience but it is good to know I am still loved of God.
Please be encouraged! God understands the thoughts that pass through our minds when we are struggling with a mental health disorder. I am so glad that GOD is my judge and not myself, because He has a better picture of what’s truly going on. We can trust Him to judge rightly.
We’d love to have you in our weekly Zoom session. Please feel free to email me about it if you have any questions.
I grew up going to Sunday school every now and then, but never learning anything. I said the sinner's prayer when I was 22 while in AA at the time. I decided to stick with AA. I had a hard time believing in or contacting God. I didn't pursue church or the Bible until years later.
I met a girl in AA who was a church member. She flirted with me, and we ended up in a sexual relationship. She broke it off because of church and God, so I started going to her church hoping to win her back. She kept coming back and leaving me again, until I told God on the way home from church that I didn't want His salvation if that is what it was going to be like. She ended up moving away. Then she called me one day to tell me she was pregnant, so I went to where she was. She lost the child in a car crash and shrugged it off the next day, giggling on the phone with her pastor back here. I came back home. Her dad was mad at me — I don't blame him. She came back here, had sex with me again, and left to go to Bible college. She got married. I never saw her again.
I found out last year that she died. I hope she was saved.
Over the next few years I cursed God and cursed Jesus because of how my life was. I wanted a girlfriend, but I was too shy. I was stuck with a job I hated. I was always having panic attacks. I didn't see anything in my life as sin.i prayed to satan for something and offered him my soul. i forgot about this for many years. Occasionally I was daring God to come down and face me as a human. I won't repeat some of the things I said. I didn't think I would ever go back to a church, but I did.
After my first night going to church for myself and meeting people there, I came home and read about the blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. The fear of God finally found me. I responded and tried to get saved in a Baptist church. I said the sinners prayer, was taught about the church, and was baptized a year later. That verse, as well as Hebrews 10:26 and Hebrews 6:4-6 always scared me because of the things i said and did. I struggled with porn. The harder I tried to stop, the worse the temptations got.
I drifted in and out of the church for a number of years and had a sexual relationship during that time, which I quickly ended when I remembered the Hebrews verses.
I sought out other churches, one after another, but found no comfort. I was still struggling with sin and on disability, unable to work due to panic attacks.
One night I saw a universal salvation website. It said everyone will be saved. They gave convincing verses of Scripture to prove it. All fear fell from me. I thought I had finally found God and faith.. I felt at peace, but something in me got kind of curious. If all will be saved, then the scary verses must not be true. I remembered a verse that said "God is not the author of confusion" and since the Bible was confusing to me, I came to the conclusion He didn't write it.
I then thought the Bible was full of riddles I had to solve. As I started doing that, I think I opened myself up to a spirit. I thought I was speaking in tongues. I was seeing things. I saw another face in my mirror. It was sort of like mine, but different. The next day the comforting spirit was gone.
I saw something online about a man pretending to be poor. If anyone helped him, he rewarded them. I was inspired to do the same, but no one helped me. I got angry. I walked all through town that day cursing everyone, filling up with hate. i cursed a good christian friend of mine who called me brother. At the end of the day fear came over me. I was crying like a two year old. A friend prayed over me to drive out whatever spirit was attacking me. i felt something pulling on my eyeballs and shaking and falling inside my head.
This was just the beginning. a few months later my baptism certificate fell off the wall. I put it behind the bureau. I still can't find it. I was still under the universal salvation spell when I saw a website of a man claiming to have keys to the Scriptures. He was "decoding" Bible verses on his own. I got a notebook and did the same.
i think satan entered me…or another demon.
I started going crazy, talking to myself as two different people. I don't know where the idea came from, but I was convinced that Jesus and Satan were brothers and God loved them both. he just wanted them to get along and work together. i went out walking that night, and saw a man who looked very dark and evil walking towards me. I came back home, had the thought that someone was around the corner to shoot me and then I slipped and fell on the ice. A few days later, I must have been really crazy because I thought I was Jesus. I ended up freaking out and was sent to the psych ward in handcuffs. The next morning when they wouldn't let me out, I cursed Jesus, which I swore to myself out of fear that I would never do again.
I got out a week later and smoked marijuana again. A bad mistake. While I was using I started decoding the verses again and I ended up back in the hospital. I went on and off the meds on my own, and ended up back in there again. This time, I lost most of my emotions. I went in due to paranoia and was paranoid when I came out. I couldn't laugh or cry, but I still had guilt and worry. I was bedridden for months.
The universalist sites held no assurance for me anymore. I started clutching at straws wondering what was going to happen to me when i die. I bounced around different websites and religions online. I didn't buy into them for long, but I went from Kundalini to Gnosticism to Yahuwshua is Yahweh (Jesus is the impostor) and another one that said that Jesus just came here to do the work of his father Satan. All these are ridiculous! I started hallucinating again.
I found the a friend of mine on-line whom I cursed that day when I was pretending to be poor. I called him up because I remembered the things I said about him. I finally started to cry! I cried my eyes out in his car. He forgave me. I was always ashamed to cry in front of other people.
I was baptized again… I cried there too and more often recently. but i pushed the bible away after reasoning with myself and God. my scizophrenia went into remission. . i was finally able to laugh again. I was finally out of my room and able to get out again. i found an online romantic relationship…fell into more sin, lost my emotions again…and lost my dad. i went schizo again. recently a friend prayed over me and laid his hand on me to drive the spirits away from me…i started to cry. over the next few weeks i was hearing voices again, i think its gonna take more thasn that if Jesus is willing to heal me of this. i still have thew delusion that im already dead, and thoughts tell me that i am too late…but i dont know.
can you help me? will God deliver me?
Is my repentance too late? Am I lost forever? Does God still love me? will Jesus still save me?i keep having blasphemous thoughts that i dont want and i think im seeking god with all my heart…but i cant be sure. every now and then i have urges to reject jesus…but i dont want to. im scared. i want to get back to that childlike faith i had on that day i saw the universalist website…is it too late for me?
Steven, the Wonderful thing about God is that our words & thoughts may offend Him but they do not make our break Him. Your unkind words/thoughts don't stop Him from being God. God is very secure in who He is, the Almighty God. It sounds like you had a hard life. A life full of disappointment, tragedy, emotional imbalance, and confusion. Instead of chasing after God for emotional validation and love, you chased after women. I completely understand; you're human. It is God who gave us desire for companionship. God created Eve because He knew it wasn't good for Adam to be alone. Seeking companionship/love isn't wrong but the way we go about it sometimes is. Do not beat yourself over this, lots of people do it. God, doesn't want to be our only love but He does want to be our First Love. He wants us to seek Him above anything or any human. There is no human or thing that can satisfy us the way God can. God, YOUR Heavenly Father, Counselor, Friend, and Creator knows EVERYTHING about You. He knows that you said mean and hateful things out of hurt. Again, I reassure you that your words may have offended God but they DIDN'T Break God. He is still on the throne. Every man/woman in the Bible did, said, and/or have thought things displeased God. Despite their wrong doings, God still forgave them, cleansed them, and used them. Moses committed murder once. King David committed adultery, got the woman pregnant, tried to cover his sin by having the woman's husband killed. Apostle Paul before he became a follower of Jesus, used to have Christians persecuted and killed. The disciple Peter cut off a man's ear. Abraham lied so he wouldn't be killed. The people were just as human and unperfect as us but God still restored them and used them in a mighty way. It takes time to have complete restoration. Our walk with God is a journey that's full of ups and downs until we die. The great thing is, God with us through the ups & downs. The ups & downs helps us to learn God in different ways, if we're patient. God never promised an easy life but He is us through it ALL. Our difficulties can strengthen our faith and patience IF we allow it to do so. I encourage you to let go of everything and everyone that doesn't encourage your faith in Jesus. Stop being hard on yourself. Take life and your relationship with God 1 day at a time and sometimes 1 hour at a time. Don't dwell on your past and don't worry about your future. Everyday, wake up and choose that This Day, I'm going to serve God/Jesus, and just focus on that day…not yesterday or tomorrow. Slowly and patiently start talking to God with an open & honest heart. You can talk to him about ANYTHING. Everything you said in your comments, go to the park and tell God. Tell Him your sorry and rededicate your life back to Him. Do not look for thunder to fall from the sky. Do not look for an overwhelming feeling of joy, just believe that God heard you. God hears our prayers when we confess our sins to Him and ask for forgiveness. The Bible says that He will not only forgive us but also cleans us from ALL unrighteousness 1John 1:9, All means ALL. To answer your question, there is hope for you. Be patient with yourself, be patient with God. There may be times that you'll feel condemned and guilty because of your past words and actions. When you feel hopeless, remind yourself that God has cleansed you from ALLLLLLLLLLLL unrighteousness. Keep faith in God/Jesus. Remember to walk with Him 1 Day at a time. Choose to read and believe the Word of God because it's true. I believe in reading a chapter of Psalm in the morning & night, starting with Chapter 1. After you've read all of Psalm, read Proverbs. It'll take time but by faith, little by little, God will transform you from the inside out. Be Patient my Friend
Steven, please find a local Catholic church and make an appointment to speak with a priest ASAP. It’s never too late to receive forgiveness. God loves you more than you can imagine. Praying for you.
Whenever I get bad thoughts these days they come with the urge or impulse like I feel like laughing or smiling sometimes what does this indicates
I've been suffering with Scrupulosity since 1994.. It started after I cursed God in 1994. I had always thought that I did the unforgivable sin. My Mind blasphemed God and the Holy Spirit constantly. The first few years were a nightmare. I would spent time in the shower and just cried. I then slowly trained my mind to stop its cursing of God and quickly say "I curse NOTHING!", "I curse HELL.", I guess that is my compulsion. I just found out a few years ago that what I have been suffering with is an OCD. I was Hospitalized for 5 months and during that time the Scrupulosity was gone. When I got back home it came back.. What was a great insight is that it CAN go away. I spoke to my Doctor and she has been putting me on Depression meds but they don't seem to be helping. When I first heard of Exposure Therapy I was admittedly terrified of the idea.. I cannot willfully curse God.
However after reading this article tonight I finally know what the Unforgivable sin is. I'm going to swim in this new found insight and see how things go.. And I might try the exposure therapy..
I really really found this site helpful.. Thank you..
Hey Ken, I'll be praying for you. God really loves you and is still for you. Be patient with yourself and draw closer to God with an open & honest relationship. As you draw closer to God, He'll draw closer to You. Remember, you can always tell God the good, bad, and ugly about yourself and your life. Your honesty, no matter how awful it is doesn't offend God. He knows that we're just humans, trying to live right, the key word is trying. The Bible says a Just man falls seven times and rises up again Proverbs 24:16. As you walk with God, you're going to fall over and over again, but keep getting back up and walk with Him one day at a time. As you learn to rest in the love, mercy, and grace of God, your anxiety and fear will lessen. You probably felt better in the hospital for 5 months because you felt some sense of security which caused you to be more relax. When you returned home, you lost that sense of security which brought on anxiety/fear, then the thoughts. Relax Ken. Know the thoughts aren't yours. Spend more time worshipping God. Verbally tell God how you love Him and how great He is. Then tell God, just in case any bad thoughts or cursing towards you/Holy Spirit come to my mind, I'm going to verbally tell you how I truly feel about you. Then worship Him. If you don't feel like praying then just have intimate conversations with God Daily. God loves when we just talk to Him because He truly cares about EVERY aspect of our lives. Your honest loving verbal words to God are more powerful than unwanted thoughts, rest in knowing that. Turn on radio stations like KLOVE or Air1 or any Christian station and walk around the house speaking beautiful truths to God. It may take a while for the unwanted thoughts to vanish but God will honor your true verbal worship.
I am 14 yrs old and I have been battling with blaspheming thoughts for over3 years now. The thing is, sometimes, i feel free, the thoughts stop, I feel like I have finally overcomes them but then all of a sudden, they just pop from nowhere, giving me reasons why I should not believe in Christ who is the one and only true GOD. It makes me unable to voice out my opinion about the Godhead for fear of blasphemy. This might sound stupid, but I struggle a lot with deciding whether to write &amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;God&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; in full Capital letters or just the way I wrote it. I feel like I&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;m going crazy, even my sister thinks I am. She doesn&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;t know anything, but these thoughts have affected my actions and I think people are beginning to notice. Sometimes, these thoughts when I&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;m reading the Bible or even trying to pray or praise God. I feel like God has not forgiven me of my sins(they are numerous) and I feel like he&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;ll never forgive me. I want to believe He has, I mean from the things I&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;ve heard and read, that God forgives whoever truly repents but then I find it hard to believe he forgive a sinner like me. And I fell this weight of unforgivess hanging on my neck all day, making me live in fear. Sometimes I even think to go ask someone to help ask God for me if my sins have been forgiven because I don&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;t have the courage to ask him because he&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;ll tell me no, but even at that, I&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;ve had dreams that is old me my sins are forgiven but then the devil( through these thoughts) comes up and confuse my mind. I often feel like I&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;ve lost eternity; that it was never even meant for me, but I still want to win souls for Christ, not wanting to make others like me but this act still does not fill the void I feel when I think that I&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;m eternally separated from the oppurtunity of having God has my father. I also feel a strange thing; like I not able to move my whole body or talk all of a sudden and then those evil thoughts come to life( voices) and they tell me I haven&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;t been forgiven and how mush they hate me and don&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;t want me to be God&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;s ( my father) daughter and sometimes even aske to join the devil in his evil work instead. I am able to come out of this trance like situation whenever I am able to pray in my heart or even jus metion Jesus&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;s name and this now only happens when I do not pray. I also find it hard dealing with sin(like the zeal of not wanting to sin making me sin). I find a mistake on everything I do, constantly forgetting the Master&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;#39;s love for me and I blame myself over it and sometimes It takes days before I eventually forgive myself. I feel like God is with me in this situation but I still fell helpless and confused most times. I pray with the guilt of sin, read my Bible and dreaind reading places that talk about blasphemies and these evil thoughts popping up. The thoughts also tell me that what I do is wrong, sinful and they made me feel confused about what the Bible says about sin. But now that I think of it, The Bible says I was and I am39; still and will be forever freed from sin not bound to son. For I am bno longer under the law but under grace and the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ is always sufficient for me. This has been settled by my Saviour The thoughts have been off for quite a long time now but they just came back this evening while I was in a Bible study but this really helped me. I read with an heavy heart but I feel much more relived (like a newborn baby), which ich I why I could type this whole thing. I am starting to believe more on the forgiveness of my sins, so thank you. Thank you so much for allowing God to use you to help people who have this kind of problem and Thank God for you.
Hi Jamie. I have been enslaved to OCD for almost my
while life. I just turned 50. I started to experiment a small taste of freedom about 9 years ago while repenting from a habit that God was dealing with me on. God had taught me to praise Him through the battle when the thoughts would hit me instead of quoting verses. I would find relief in this tactic, but I eventually got burned out and angry. I had a nightmare where I thought I might have spoke out a blasphemous thought in my sleep.
After I finally was exhausted, frustrated, and had literally no one who related to me. I was doing a
compulsion and said part of it wrong. After that I had all kinds of terrifying “spiritual experiences” where in the past I would get spiritual encouragement that if “I did that sin I would not care.” Even a stranger at my church at the time came up to me and told me I was like Samson and that the Philistines were upon me because I had sinned. This terrified me too.
Then I told God well, “If I did the unpardonable sin please don’t let me be a reprobate because I want to be used so others can be saved.” I had said this to God before the woman at the church, “prophesied over me.” Also a very good friend of mine told me I needed to ask forgiveness for rejecting grace which was the last thing I ever wanted to do. I had been stuck in legalism for most of my born again life.
God still answers most of the prayers I pray. I have had really amazing experiences with God throughout my life, but also terrible anxiety. I grew up in a home that was very unstable with lots of angry outbursts. I never felt safe.
I learned about the unpardonable sin right after I asked Jesus in my heart. It terrified me so that I felt I was never able to truly relax in His love on a regular basis. I know I have been diagnosed with religious OCD. I constantly tell God I came to Him for relief not torment. I believe the torment was allowed through unforgivness that I had in the past. Since then I have forgiven my parents completely. I believe my
upbringing molded me into a person who could not
trust.. Neither myself and sometimes God. Abuse does not foster a sense of security nor trust
I know I have had emotional needs that have never truly been met on a regular basis. That is why I go to God in prayer so often. I see Him as my therapist. It is hard for me to share these things, but I really do desire to be set free. I know God is the only one who can do this for me. I think having people in my life who relate to this torture is in of itself helpful.
Thanks for taking the time to read this. I don’t know which option is best suited for me because I am so burned out on thinking about this. I wish all of the nonsense would just go away.
Thanks for being interested in helping others who struggle. God bless you.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. It certainly sounds like you’ve had a rough road, and I’m glad that you’ve come to Jesus for healing. You are definitely in the right place. Oh, how He loves you!
I don’t have your entire story and background, but some parts of your comment bothered me. I feel a little disturbed at any church environment where people can walk up to each other and condemn each other by saying you’re like Samson or would tell you to ask forgiveness for rejecting grace. This feels a little bit spiritually intrusive and inappropriate. No one knows your heart except God. Personally, I am highly suspect of people who go around “prophesying” over others. I have had a large number of my clients come with spiritual baggage for this exact reason, which in reality these are not prophecies at all. These are often emotionally aroused people who say the first thing that comes to mind whenever they get the tingles down their spine–definitely NOT what Scripture means when it speaks about true prophecy. I would caution you against listening to random individuals who claim to have the gift of prophecy. In fact, there are a number of biblical “tests” of a true prophet, which would include
1. 100% Prophetic Accuracy (Deuteronomy 18:22, Jeremiah 28:9)
2. Habitually Exalts Jesus (1 John 4:1-2)
3. Upholds Scripture (Isaiah 8:20, 1 Corinthians 14:37)
4. Spiritual Fruit of Personal Righteousness, Leads Others to Obedience (Deuteronomy 13:1-4, Matthew 7:20)
Part of our Christian growth experience is leaving behind the faulty conceptions we’ve picked up about Him (from parents, from church members, from society/culture). Please don’t beat up on yourself if you don’t get it right overnight. This is a lifetime journey with the Lord, and He’s waaaaay more patient with you than you are with yourself! Keep coming to God and talking to Him, and try to ignore the thoughts that you’ve committed the unpardonable sin. God is with you and He’s teaching you. We all have a burden to bear–for some it might be poverty, or blindness, or loneliness. For us, it’s an anxiety disorder that gets mixed up in our walk with God. But it’s ok, God loves us anyways!
Be of good courage and keep pressing forward!
Wow, that last part described my mental suffering to a T. Here I’m thinking I had committed the unpardonable sin over and over and even now God is still with me cause I feel the conviction and the Holy Spirit at times. I am a redevoted believer trying my hardest to rebuild my faith. My biggest fear is that I would become more distant and hardened due to just giving up eventually. I have suffered for a week now with intrusive thoughts from my own to several voices inside which has drawn me nearly to the brink of insanity. Yet God is still with me cause I feel him within my spirit. It’s my own fears and anxiety that say otherwise. I even do have those ego moments where my mind will literally go against or challenge God or Jesus and have me believing it to be so. Yet God is still here. Because I earnestly seek his love and mercy and forgiveness. It’s not easy at all especially when you have the ultimate fear of losing salvation through it all but the fact that you explained it in terms of how they acted in the past towards Jesus. That is not me or even my deepest desire. I know who God is and I know my savior even though my mind might try to deceive me otherwise.
Glenn, listen to Ryan Stevenson song (YouTube) "No Matter What." One day I was talking to God about how I was feeling due to intrusive thoughts. I felt like one thought caused me to lose years of serving God. Right after speaking to God, the song "No Matter What" came on the air. It ministered to my soul.
Thank you for this. I needed this. i have one question tho, why does it feels like it is my willful thoughts but it's not
Once we have a thought, it'll never be erased from our brain. It may lie dormant in our subconscious mind but it'll never be erased. Since the thought/s are in our mind, different things can easily trigger the thoughts and bring them to the conscious mind. Also the more you resist the thoughts, the more they persist. The more you suppress the thoughts the more they'll fight against you. It's not your true willful thoughts. If they were your true thoughts, they wouldn't bother you. It's probably just the fact the mind will never totally erase the thought from your brain that makes it feel like it's coming willfully from you.
Hello, thank you for this article. Your explanation on blasphemy against the Holy Spirit being about unbelievers was very comforting because I have been told the wrong thing for a long time regarding this sin.
Wow, this has really helped me alot, i have been have this unwanted thoughts to God and the people i interact with, and as a result i have always felt ashamed and atimes shy to speak, gence a reduced self-esteem
I am 18 years old and I have grown up a deep thinking but also a fun loving and passionate girl. Around 15/16 I became extremely doubtful and lost in my head and I didn’t know who I was. I questioned everything and analyzing everything in my life to the point of depression. With the help of my family and a therapist I finally started to feel like myself again. I learned mindfulness mediation, and discovered a motivational speaker named Wayne Dyer. After listening to his videos and reading his books my life has never been the same. I feel so much peace love and compassion for myself, for others, and for God. I have always believed in Jesus and loved the comfort he brought me. I went to church occasionally growing up but nothing huge. However, after I found so much peace for so long and finally found my most loving self… I feel like God is constantly condemning me for listening to Wayne Dyer. Wayne Dyer speaks about the Bible and Jesus teachings and quite a bit about God. However, he is a New Age philosopher which I am scared God won’t forgive me for believing. But if Jesus really loves and forgives me then shouldn’t he be happy I found a teacher that works for me? I can not stop the endless guilt.
If God is convicting you, trust it, He is leading you away from something dangerous.
In terms of Dr Osborne's method, do we transfer the intrusive thought to God once off and then maintain trust as the thought returns? Can multiple methods be used, for instance Dr Osborne's method and mockery?
Hello Jamie ,
I find that that out of nowhere I can be just thinking of other stuff and all of a sudden bad thoughts against God come in and words. I fear he has abandoned me but I get upset and fearful to the point I get physically ill and keep going over it and over it. What can I do? Will God turn his back on me?
Hello Brenda. Something God showed me was that Jesus dealt with bad thoughts. Most people never saw it like this, neither did I but when Jesus was in the wilderness fasting for 40 days/nights the devil tempted Him. Luke 4:1-13 The Bible speak of 3 temptations, however I believe there were possibly more that wasn't mentioned, as I believe Jesus performed miracles that weren't mentioned in the Bible. Anyways, we don't know if the Devil came to Jesus as a spirit, human, or intrusive thought but one thing we know is… When the devil tempted Jesus to: 1. Turn stone into bread 2. Jump down 3. Bow down and worship Satan, before Jesus was able to respond to the devil, the devil's words had to first be processed in Jesus' mind (intrusive thought) before He could quote the Word of God. In Psalm, King David mentioned that when he saw the prosperity of the wicked his foot almost slipped (turn from God) Psalm 73:1-2. David was more in likely thinking in an ungodly manner that was causing the temptation for him to give up on God. Thankfully, our intrusive thoughts aren't us. They bother us because we don't agree with them nor like them. No, Brenda. Even if it feels that God has left you, He is true to His Word Hebrews 13:5, He'll never leave you or forsake/abandon you. Walk by Faith, not by feelings. He is for us, not against us.
What do I do? For the the past year I've been struggling with intrusive thoughts and now it getting worse. I have anxiety about this sin everyday and I keep having these negative thoughts about cursing God or walking away from the faith and I'm worried that I have a hardened heart. I have these thoughts that say I don't care or that I have committed the sin and that I'm going to Hell and I don't feel God or feel the Holy Spirit. It would be other thoughts like God’s not real or that I don’t love/love God and that I'm lying to myself. I try to stop them immediately but they’ve been really draining emotionally, mentally. I don’t want to give but I’m scared that I have. They happen constantly and I'm afraid I'm not feeling conviction the same way I used to, so I'm scared I'm not feeling it at all. I'm struggling with these thoughts and feelings and I ask for forgiveness but I don't know if I'm asking for the right reasons. Like I feel like I constantly have to remind myself to ask for forgiveness and then I just sit there and continuously ask repeatedly, but I'm scared that God is not hearing me because I feel like I've committed the unpardonable sin. These thoughts are confusing me so I don't know if they are true or if I'm saved and I'm worried that I don't care because I want to care but I don't know what I feel and that's what scares me. Like it scares me that I feel numb or like I have a hardened heart. I'm scared that I'm lying to myself and that these thoughts are true instead of false. I don't want to feel this way. It’s like I’ve been dealing with it for so long that it seems like I've become accustom to it. It’s just been confusing me because I don’t know what happening and I’ve been questioning like whether I am really a Christian or whether I truly love God or if I’ve just been living a lie with myself. I’ve been really numb not just with this but with everything in my life. I’m not the best with talking about feelings and usually I keep them bottled up so I don’t know how to process through this and every time I see something in instagram about it or like with verse that talks people knowing God in their hear and not in their heart I get more anxiety because I feel like that’s me or that maybe I just trying to avoid Hell instead of actually having a relationship with God. I don’t want to doubt or be in unbelief about God and I don’t know how to stop feeling this way.
Amirrah, thankfully, nowhere in the Bible does it tell us to serve God with our feelings. The Bible clearly says the Just shall live by Faith (not feelings) Hebrews 10:38. We walk by Faith, not by sight 2 Corinthians 5:7. Without Faith (not feelings) it's impossible to please God Hebrews 11:6. I understand that numb feeling. You can look at it as something scary or you can rest in that feeling and choose to relearn God. A lot of us came to know God/Jesus from a religious background that made God look more like a Judge who is ready to sentence you to eternal damnation instead of the Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Prince of Peace, and Everlasting Father the Bible says He is, Isaiah 9:6. God is a God who is for us, not against us Romans 8:31. I encourage you to read the whole book of Psalms, 1 chapter at a time. Kind David and others had many times when they felt that God wasn't with them. Even Job, wondered where God was Job 23:8-10. It's in these moments, we learn to get out of our feelings and learn true faith. Even when you can't feel Him, make up your mind everyday, to walk with Him no matter what. Not feeling the conviction may be a good thing because it will allow you to relax in thinking so much and feeling so tensed because of the thoughts. Eventually, as you start focusing on other important and positive things in your life, one day you may realize those intrusive thoughts have gone away. Every morning start your day with a daily devotional such as "Jesus Calling" Read the book and read the Bible chapters that go with it. If you can, go outdoors, maybe to the park and just talk to God, even when you don't feel it. Read books, listen to sermons/teaching that speak on the Love, Grace, and Mercy of God. It may be that you need to patiently learn your Heavenly Father who loves you, and let go of the Angry God who wants to harm you. It may take time but be patient and choose God everyday, no matter how you feel.
Not sure if you will read the comment again , but I am going through what you are going through. And you know if you would like to reach out and talk about it. I see others have gone through this, I don’t want to go to hell either, I remember the love of God and the feelings of serving him only and still do and will always do. I am just like you , fighting on. And I totally agree your point, I am somewhere like this
Thank God for this article, it has been a great help for me. I started to have these thoughts in the beggining of this year, i thought they had passed but they came again after a month. I got desperate and then found this website, it again passed and I kinda forgot about it, but then last month it got realy bad again, I had doubts about the existence of God and started to blame him for everything that had gone wrong in my life, i was desperate for some relief and, obviously it didn't help. I asked my mom and brother to help me and they have been really patient towards this situation. I had really bad anxiety attacks, which I never had, and lost a lot of weight in only a week. I've started therapy in the middle of all of this and together with this website, it really helped. Now the thoughts still come, but i fell numb, like I lost the presence of God and I expect the bad feeling to come or anything at all, but it's just a big nothing.
I feel like I don't have a lot of time, I don't know why. I know it says that God will never forsake those who call out to Him, but what if all this time I was faking it and these thoughts are just a reflection of what I really feel? Because right now I feel nothing at all and it gets really hard to think of Jesus and His sacrifice for me, like it's too far away for me to get to. And I've been praying for the Spirit to give me anything (such as a fear of condemnation so I can go running back to my saviour or just some love towards God, so I can know that I didn't commit the unpardonable sin), but I know that's not how it works and I keep on feeling nothing. I know this sounds bad, but i prefer the feeling of guilty and shame over this nothing right now, I expected to come out a lot stronger and zealous on my relationship with God, but it feels like I've abandoned everything and when I try to get back to it, it feels fake or something, I don't really know how to describe this.
I hope God hears me and will give me faith so I can believe that Jesus died for all my sins, has saved me, and will deliver me from all this unbelief and numbness.
Thank you for your great work and for helping so many. Gob bless you"
Thank you very much Sir, during my moments of ts thoughts I sometimes do feel God so real and that he's looking at me and answering me.Sometimes too I use to feel abandoned unhappy and that He is very angry with me.
I also use to feel a strong sensation of preaching the gospel in which if I don't,I will feel so much condemned,I don't use to preach it because I think I will be a liar.What can I do in such situations sir?
Hey Guys! I’m here to comment not to comment about a problem I have but to spread a message of hope. Last month, in the beginning of May, I was struggling with thoughts bad. Now these thoughts weren’t any normal thoughts but they were thoughts that felt SO real. These thoughts absolutely felt 100% real, that I willfully chose them and that there was no hope. Truthfully, the first time was in the shower when I was freaking out and I kept having thoughts that popped up over and over again because I kept rolling my eyes to the back of my head and breathing hard. It felt like I willfully kept the thoughts going on purpose when most likely it was nothing but intrusive thoughts and urges. Now the urges my friends is what gets you because of the way it feels. Truthfully, it FEELS like you are doing it because of the feelings of pushing it out. I know all you OCD sufferers out there like me know what I’m talking about. You feel like you willfully chose it and you want it right? But I’m here to tell you that all of that is false. None of your thoughts were chosen. Especially the blasphemous ones. Now the second time I felt like I truly blasphemed happened in my bed when I woke up. I was having blasphemous thoughts against the Holy Spirit and then I was like “arguing” with myself in my head and then I thought I truly willfully blasphemed against the Holy Spirit with my thought because of how it felt, sounded and of course the urge that came with it. But then I realized when I had that thought, I was breathing heavily and anticipating it. It was intrusive again. And now the third time is the one that I struggle with even to this day but I’m still fighting. The third time, I was battling temptations, I lusted and then I felt horrible because I had bad thoughts against the Holy Spirit when lusting and it just felt terrible. I felt like I willfully did this so I got so depressed that I kept having bad thoughts against the Holy Spirit that one carried no feelings of anxiety with it until the thought had ended and then I kept having them and it felt like I truly WILLFULLY chose them but then again I look back and I see that I was breathing heavily, was over analyzing everything, had a resistance to the thought and did not agree and to this day I’m still ruminating over whether I truly said a blasphemy or not. Now friends, this may seem long and drawn out but I’m here to tell you there is still hope. Jesus says in the Bible that no one can snatch us from His hand and that The One who has started a good work in us will finish it until the day of Christ Jesus. Hold on to these truths and they will help you. Think about it this way, God is infinitely powerful and great. He can never lose so why would He even bother giving you the Holy Spirit if He is going to lose? He will never lose no matter what and even the people’s failures in the Bible such as King David, Paul and even Jacob has brought people hope. God always takes people’s failures and made them for good. Friends, the reason why we are so scared all the time is because we see ourselves as Judas, a demon, King Saul and the others in the Bible who God has rejected. We are not them. We have to remember that thanks to Jesus we are presented blameless and with great joy in front of God and even when we mess up, we are still not hated. God abounds with love on everyone He gets called on by and we are under His grace and not the law which is you sin, you go to hell. Now under grace, we have to fight for Gods love and fight our flesh so we can have a RELATIONSHIP with God and not just rules, rules and rules. We are free now but we still have to stay strong and deny ourselves but NOT fall into legalism. It’s so hard, I know but please stay strong. It’s the hardest thing a person can go through feeling forsaken, scared and worried over something we cannot know until we die. But you know who else felt like this? Jesus. Jesus felt forsaken on the cross but He overcame those feelings and won in the end for everyone. Just remember you can KNOW you have eternal life if you believe in Jesus, trust in Him and rest knowing that He has everything in His hands no matter what. Life is not random, things happen with God always watching. Your eternal life is safe with God despite the annoying blasphemous thoughts, feelings and urges. Stay strong guys.
You have hit the nail on the head. I feel this article was written for me. I cannot thank you enough! Interesting that I was already quickened to the Ps 23 "Table in the presence of my enemies." I believe I was divinely inspired to do that, then read it here!
Isn’t that amazing? People aren’t inspired–the BIBLE is inspired. 🙂 It’s beauty is there for all to find!
My doubt is about the resurrection. I am scared I just cannot believe it. I want to believe it because I want to be saved. I am so scared.
Rhonda, you don't have to be scared. It's not always to believe what we can't humanly comprehend, that's why when it comes to the Bible we live it through faith, faith, and more faith, not understanding. The Bible tells us that all we have to have is faith of a mustard seed (Matthew 17:20), not a watermelon seed which is bigger. We never seen Jesus or God but we simply believe by faith that He's real. Although you don't fully understand the resurrection, still believe in Jesus. Don't force the belief because that can cause you to fight the belief inwardly. It's ok to say God, I believe but help my unbelief Mark 9:24. The Bible says Faith comes by hearing the Word of God Romans 10:17. As you draw closer to God with an open, honest, and intimate relationship with God, tell Him about your unbelief as well as EVERYTHING else that concerns you. Again, don't force the belief, allow God to help you. It's not your job to save you. God is the author and finisher of your faith Hebrews 12:2-4.
Very informative read. I skimmed the article and was appreciative of its content, as this is something I wrestle with daily. I think its good reinforcement to read for reminders sake, which is helpful when in the middle of a psychological battle. I definitely saved this site for future reads!
I find that ignoring intrusive thoughts is a good tactic; at times I usually go about my day and ask for forgiveness at night. Other times I beat myself up, give in, and start trying to convince myself, mentally and through prayer. Sometimes my frustrations turn toward God. Its unfortunate but I'm still alive and blessed, which is always settling to remember.
For everyone, let's stay strong and committed, and remember that we're all in this together!
Thank you very much, with all the sincerity in the world.
Can these thoughts be stopped by just ignoring them? Like do we need to go for counselling or anything to get oevr this?
Some people benefit from therapy, while others are able to manage on their own. It would be hard for me to say, because everyone is unique!
Thank you so much .
Does blasphemous thoughts also apply to other gods as well?
Yes, religious OCD strikes people of all religious backgrounds. I very recently worked with a Hindu client who had severe blasphemous thoughts about her gods. At the root of it we need to discern that these unwanted thoughts are largely from a mental health disorder, not from our spiritual experience with God.
Oh thank you! During the past few weeks I had these blasphemous thoughts at the time( I didn't knew about the name of it at first) it was about God but now my blasphemous thoughts were also directed at other gods like Buddha and such. I don't follow Buddhism or any other religion but it started to get worse over the past few days I was thinking if this sort of this is forgiven. What are your thoughts on this?
Yes, the content of our intrusive thoughts is not important at all. It’s possible to get sticky, unwanted thoughts about God, Buddha, the president, your child, your dog, your kitchen knives, your socks, etc. 🙂 Seeing your thoughts get worse over the last few days is most likely from focusing on these thoughts, turning them over in your mind, and worrying about what they mean and if they’re forgivable. The intrusive thoughts of OCD are like that: the more you focus on them, the bigger and stickier they get. Treat the thoughts like unimportant static. When they come up, say, “whatever,” and keep moving with the duties of life. They might be there asking for your attention, but determine to keep putting one foot in front of the other, engaging with your daily responsibilities, without getting derailed by the thought.
Thank you very much!
Thank you soooo much for that article on intrusive thoughts because God knows I needed more information and intel on these thoughts that keep bothering me. First it was just thoughts on questioning the reality of God and then thoughts that denying God etc. However,I felt that this was God's way of telling me to remain calm and think of him alone because i was panicking and wondering why am I having these thoughts because I am a Christian and would they affect my eternal life but God gave me this information the same day it seems to be getting worse and I can't thank him enough for that peace within that I feel now. Thank you for your help I appreciate it very much.
Should I also ignore these thoughts when I'm angry? They feel the most real and strong then and often give me anxiety when I settle down.
Yes, these unwanted thoughts can come with all kinds of emotions–anger, anxiety, fear, passivity, numbness, and self-loathing. All of it is your brain’s bid for your attention. Keep right on going and ignore these thoughts. Don’t argue with them, don’t try to avoid them, don’t try to “eject” them with various rituals or body movements. “You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you” (John 15:3). Jesus has already cleansed you, and these thoughts cannot touch you as long as you let them roll like water off a duck’s back.
Hey Jaimie, recently, well actually today, my thoughts have become so horrible. All of a sudden they feel chosen because when they come I get anxiety but I feel so numb like my anxiety is fake or something and I had thoughts in the shower and they felt so real and I think I might be doomed. I dont know if I messed up now, I think im so doomed. I feel like these thoughts came from me but Im not sure. I need some help.
God bless you! Your article was extremely helpful…I believe that this was God’s way of showing me that intrusive thoughts and OCD were not me. That He loves me and it will all be okay. One part I that really resonated with me was about the bees and being “still”.
“Be still and know that I am God” Psalm 46:10. It reminds us that we must put our trust in Him and be still…knowing that He is God and through Him all things are possible. Thank you so much for the good work that you are doing and sharing💕
I'm totally blessed by your article… I've been struggling with blasphemous thoughts since february.they may have started a little earlier when I was younger but they would quickly subside…but recently it's been hell…it just felt like my mind was hijacked..like it wasn't me anymore but something else living in me… I've been depressed for five months now because I was pregnant and have a baby through c section…I don't know if that can be said to be the cause…I get so scared…I feel sucidal most of the time to a point of also wanting to hurt my child… the last two days have been better especially after reading your article and I thank God for that
You’re speaking words of wisdom. OCD is greatly exacerbated by stress, and it sounds like you’ve had lots of that lately with a difficult birth. Give yourself time and mercy, and I think you’ll see things reduce back down to a manageable level.
Hi! My name is Jenn and i am 38 years old. I have been dealing with OCD for about 20 years. But now in the past years my OCD has been primarily based with my faith. I've been going to therapy since August 2020 and it has helped a little with the addition of medication. This website has been very helpful.
I primarily have the blasphemous thoughts and one other issue. The other issue is very embarrassing and very troubling to me. I've told my therapist i'm petrified of the devil in every way and form. I'm always afraid of doing something that would be a positive towards him. Whenever i pray, i'll say Jesus' name and automatically the devil stuff pops into my head and says i'm praying to the devil. I have thoughts that say so and so believe in the devil or have done something bad when i know all is not true. I don't know why this comes into my head and i feel like i'm at the end of my rope, I don't understand why i would even think that. I'm even to the point where in order for me to pray to Jesus i have to either see him (statue/painting) or a cross. i just don't know anymore. I used to be a Eucharistic Minister and a CCD teacher. I am no longer a Eucharist Minister, mainly my decision…but I was basically told by the clergy that i could not teach the kids because i married a man that had been divorced.
I just feel lost. I want my relationship with God back…I feel like i've lost him.
Does anyone have any advice?
Hey Jen, I've been dealing with similar things as well, something with the devil associated with holy things or Jesus. I read the article and I think it's important that you get the key points from it… these thoughts are not our own. And God loves us and knows what our true intentions are, and trust me I had those same thoughts but I recognize they weren't my own, they came from an outside source and God knows that better than me. So just ignore them and move on. I am going to try this method where I have a sorting system in my mind, all these thoughts that are not mine go back where it came from, and the thoughts that are mine come into my brain.
Hope this helps, and God bless.
Hi, I have had similar struggles and find this forum encouraging as I am not alone!!!
I have had unwanted blasphemous thoughts against the blood of Jesus and the Holy Spirit, when I love the Lord with all my heart and walk with Him. I have had them to the point of struggling entire church services, at 3 Am, etc. I started using the "table in the presence of my enemies" exercise on my own, then read it in this article. I also found re-assuring that I met most of the criteria for the OCD, ego-dystonic thought pattern, which was re-assuring.
Hang in there. God is good. Mo Higgs
Hi Jenn, I struggle with similar things too… God loves you nonetheless! I wanted to ask, are you a Catholic? If you are, I definitely suggest imploring Our Lady's intercession and pray the Rosary… it will help with intrusive thoughts and bad thoughts, and strengthen and restore your relationship with God 100%! God bless you, I am praying for you😊
I am Catholic.
Same I can relate , I’m thinking of going to like a camp that brings people closer to god I NEED accountability bc I have became VERY lazy and numb
I can relate to the desire to go to camp or various classes that will bring spiritual accountability, but please take care. In normal scenarios, this is a good idea, but when we are in an obsessive-compulsive spike, intense religious experiences can really backfire. What we need right now is a calming and child-like way of relating to God. We need to learn how to cast our cares upon God in complete trust. The Bible calls this “righteousness by faith,” and this is the opposite of “righteousness by works.” We human beings have always liked to work our way to salvation, as if salvation is something we could buy or earn. But salvation is a living, breathing relationship with God, and so the only “work” that we need to be concerned about is simply to abide in Christ in a childlike, trusting way (see John 15).
What I’ve seen sometimes is that people with scrupulosity, who are already feeling like they never do enough, get stressed out to the point of feeling numb; then, to reassure themselves that there’s still some spiritual passion inside, they will spur themselves on at a religious camp meeting, Bible school, or retreat. But in many cases it will backfire and make them even more intensely anxious. My recommendation is to stay home and say, “Lord, I’m super confused about my spiritual life. I’m anxious about almost everything, and no matter how long I think about these things, I can’t quite figure them out. Will you help me? You see that I’m going back and forth between being too intense and then feeling numb and exhausted. You see that I can’t fix this in my own strength. Will you help me find the right balance? I don’t know how you’ll do that, Lord, but I’m going to just keep coming to you every day and bringing you my confused feelings for YOU to heal them. Thank you for what you’re doing in my life already! In Jesus’ name, amen.”
The answer to intensity is not more intensity. The answer is to learn how to trust. God will help you, Italia. He is with you and He loves you very much. Keep trusting; you’ll be alright.
What a beautiful response. We do try to earn our salvation.
Oh my I have sm typos the gots I meant god , but I'm sacred my heart has been hardened the only thing that keeps me going is I believe the one who started good work will bring it to completion", I dont want to be lead astray!
Okay so this may not make sense but I'm 15 years old, and I think even though all of this stuff has been happening I always felt like gods will is being done in me …..let me explain, B4 I was saved I saw this tic tok saying is it just me or when u pray do u hear f god , and I was like yeah I used to hear this, later down the road I stared to get more into god , I was veryinuscre and was going into affermations but something was telling me not to I prayed to got asking him if it was bad to do that, a couple of days later I got onto youtube on my TV (I say that bc I'm not singed in so the algorithm its super random also bc I do believe our phone hear us and tablet-like they be listening or whatever….. and I prayed this prayer in my head 2 , But any ways I saw a video on manifistation and how it was bad … she also talkeed about how she would but curses on her mom but since her mom was with god they all went onto her and not her mom. So I was like ok woaah so no more of that stuff….later down the road I get more into it I started to watch faith with viaian and got my first bible I LOVED it , it was so fun reading genesis I knew almost nothing of god , I loved telling my mom about the bible exspecially about David Idk why I like David so much I guess I was attracted to his heart ( not in a lustful way just in a awe way) it seemed like he always did the best, I had moments where I felt love in my heart when I would spend one hour listening to warship music studying the word and just having fun coloring my bible (my bible is the inspire praise one), I loved It, fast forward I start to read scripture and the F god came into my head , it would come and go during prayer, but it was when I fasted from yt and tv when the warfare got BAD i did this for lent and jesus heald my moms skin so I fasted from yt a bit longer all the way till april 24 , I could'nt watch tv with out things going wrong , I could have conversation without being in my mind , I could't read or do math yesterday I could't read a sentance and my 9 year old cousin made fun of me , I told people to not cuss infort of me wich honesly is actually good bc I need to gaurd my ears more and through this good has came from it little things have happend where I feel like god is speaking 2 me right now y bigsest promblem is my heart I refuse to repeant bc there is no sorrow in me I dont feel bad and its scaryy but through this ive written so many of my sins down and its like its the holy spirt and somethign in me is telling me god is working in my heart write now that its his bc I told him I want to feel sorry with all my heart when I sin I want to feel sad bc I hurt my father not bc of hell I WANT THAT I want the pain for my father but the LOVE 2 , and I dont like saying "thankyou " eaither bc it seems fake , and I think back when I relised I wasn't always like this I felt GUILT and dicused at my own sin but now when I wrote it down I felt nothing…and 2 days ago I got this fear all over my heart to get up out of bed and do my routine of turing on the light to wake up my mom and the stove this is one way I do my lords will is by helping my mom I felt like that was him… there were time when I was lazy and tried to take naps but my spirt guied me to my cousin's house and I was doing more of God's will by helping them I loved that day the voices were still kinda there but quiet so I was like huh interesting…..Ive also learnd to not jude other I really donlt know other mindsets like I told my mom all of this and she thought I should just cuss back she said and that god knows this is not you so don't feel so sad and I was like ok….that day the voices were VEry quite after that talk I thought it was over and I sang praises to jesus and mary with all my heart and mind it felt so good that lasted 2 days and then after I slipped up and acidenty said Stup*d god and I had a happy heart in me so it felt weird to confesses I still did it and It tho but it felt like my heart left after that hear I am now ,tommowrs the 24 and thats the day I was expecting all of this to leave, and I got on my knees and prayed got on my laptop and got on here the vocies have almost left once I started reading, but my heart feels the same….and I also told got to not delay bc then I would tell me that it was acc all me saiing the things in my head not wafare so mabye thats why he showed me this today Im not sure .I think the worse thing is that i dont feel god sm I feel like I prayed so much Ive lost glimpse
of reality .
So I am 16 now, and I was saved too recently.
I think the reason you have relief as you just let it out is because your mind kept it in all the time and is finally getting some relief without pushback, kinda like after straining or doing a hard workout you get relief. Since you were fighting the war and putting stress on yourself by doing that, by winning or losing, neither side matters, the thing that matters is that it put an end to the warfare of stress which gave you relief. And probably the easier thing to do was just to say it and by "losing" you had relief. But this is not really a spiritual thing more so a stress and relief thing so I don't think you have to worry.
Remember that God loves you not on your actions but by faith and he knows your intentions more than you do. Trust me on this, and that those thoughts are not your own, as you struggle with them. Just brush them off and move on. God will forgive. 🙂
Is it possible for you to talk with me. My blasphemous prophane thoughts have been going on almost a year and a half. Pretty much 24/7. Now I am doing it willfully and blatantly, I fear thatI am in trouble. I want to love the Lord (Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit) like I used to. I want to stop.
Hi Debbie! I wish we could meet…I actually have a really full schedule these days. But I know what you mean about feeling like the unwanted thoughts are willful. I have a video that talks about this exact thing–I encourage you to look through the videos! I don’t believe it’s actually willful, I think it’s more like a response from mental exhaustion. But anyways, take a look through my videos on intrusive thoughts and let me know what you think.
GIRLLLLLL I feel like this 2! but wow a year and a half I’ve only had this for like 4 months and I’ve became Numb and I have said some stuff willfully I didn’t mean what I said , but then since i feel numb and lazy I feels like I meant it , idk but I feel like the ocd gets to your feeling beliefs and then actions which I don’t want that , I also got into a relationship with god not knowing much really and I feel like my prayers have been useless bc I’m praying to god and not Jesus ? I’m still confused on who to pray 2 like do I have 2 relationships god and Jesus and the holy spirt , it’s confusing, and then people talking about END TIMES don’t really help……..
Hi Jamie I dont know why I let these thoughts beat me up! I know they are not from me and that I don’t want them! I just had a baby and was a little weak! That’s when they came out of nowhere! Please pray for me! Please give me pointers! I know this too shall pass and I will be stronger than ever!
Hello I want to subscribe to your coaching session but they are sold out. What should I do so I can get in line so to speak. I have been dealing with a bout of scrupulosity for about 3 months. It has been difficult. Thank you.
I’m sorry but I don’t have a waiting list. As soon as I have availabilities, it will appear on the website, so I would encourage you to check back in a few weeks.
Hi there. Is it possible for you to talk to me a bit? I am going through this and its mental torment. First it was thoughts against the Holy Spirit, then God, and now its againsr Jesus. I hate it so much. I dont even want to type it out
Hi, Lu-Andro! Yes, I’d love for us to be able to sit down and talk in one of my coaching sessions. Right now my appointments are all booked out, but hopefully I’ll have some open soon. Stay strong in the Lord and keep checking back for openings!
I understand you are tormented with this. I have been dealing with mine for about forty years now off and on. When you get try to get close to God it worsens. When I get out of church and not reading my Bible, it eases up. Mine attacks me when I am reading my Bible or when I am trying to pray or when I am listening to a a sermon or something like that. I am not saying to get out of church because that makes it easier. Our duties are to worship God and that’s what I will keep doing. I just keep praying about it and this article really hits home. I have this phrase that goes on in my mind in nicer words screw the Lord. I don’t mean it st all. The more I tell me self I am not going to think about it today, automatically make me start thing about it. I pray strongly everyday 2 to 3 time a day for God to forgive me for my thoughts and dreams. I always have dreams with something to do with sexual sin with a woman besides my wife. I do not understand where these thought and dreams come from but they are there everyday and night. Seems when I am reading my Bible it pops up in my head, when I am praying it comes up in my head. When I am at church listener my to a sermon at t come up. I tell satan to get out of my path in the name of the father, son and the Holy Ghost and it usually goes away and let’s me finish what I am doing. I was lying there in bed when I started praying and it popped up so I decided to google it. That is why I am here now. Yep read the whole article and it is very reliving after reading it. I now just have to convince myself that it is satan doing this and not myself. Thanks for your article and to all of you, hang in there and let God.
Hi Jaimie. Thank you very much for replying. I think I'm still young, 18 yo, Brazilian now living in Japan, but I already messed up a lot, really sad. And this is something I'm having a problem with for around 1, 2 years or something. I've been feeling depressed for some years, and backsliding, unfortunately. But I want to come back/closer to God, but there are some questions and doubts I have.
I think I lost some of my feelings. I think my heart is hardened. I'm not sure if I'd cry or feel deeply sad when asking for forgiveness. Not feeling deeply sad makes me question if my repentance is real. How would I know if repentance is real? And is it possible to get my feelings back?
I'm afraid I'm not genuine. What if my motivation to come back to God isn't because of love, but because I'm interested in the benefits and not going to hell. What if the reason I want to love God is because I don't wanna go to hell?
I think that the evidence clearly points to Christianity, and the other religions or atheism are not attractive to me. So I feel like I may not have a lot of faith, what if I'm just choosing Christianity because it is a more intelligent decision? More advantageous.
I've bought books, watched videos, debates, read websites and concluded that the evidence and arguments for Christianity are just much better than other religions or atheism, and I mean much better. So I think intellectually I can't stop believing in Christianity even if I wanted to. But there comes a problem? Where's my faith? Where is the faith part in me? That makes me worried.
I think I'm a bad person. I think it may be very probable that the reason I want to get back to God is purely because of selfish/intellectual reasons. Like the reasons I wrote earlier, and going to heaven and not hell…
About this attitude of looking for change and trying to get back to God. How can I know if this is because of God calling me or because of my selfish/intellectual motivations?
I want to have a better/correct motivation, like love God. But I'm afraid the reason I want to do that is because of selfish/intellectual/interested in the benefits reasons. I'm worried, how do I deal with this, and how do I fix it?
3. I'm terrified of this:
I'm afraid I've messed up my life so badly there's no hope. In the Bible there are many verses that make me feel scared. Because I did so many stupid things, you have no idea, I feel lost. I feel desperate and depressed.
I think I'm backslidden, and I think my heart is hardened. I also have sinned a lot, the worst part is i think I sinned willfully and deliberately, a LOT. Which is really bad.
I'm also afraid of being unable to truly repent, having a seared conscience or a reprobate mind.
I heard that if I'm even worried that I have these things, that means I don't have it, but what if I'm worried about it because of selfish/intellectual reasons like: I'm worried because I definitely don't want to go to hell, because that would be really bad. How do I deal with, what should I do?
4. I don't want to live depressed. I want to get back/closer to God, I want hope. But these doubts make me feel bad, it's terrifying.
Can someone like me come back and be accepted? Even if the worst case scenario is true? Like even if my feelings are kinda lost, even if my motives are selfish/intellectual, even if my heart is hardened, even if I have willfully and deliberately sinned a LOT, backslidden, and etc?
Not sure if I can include a reprobate mind, or a seared conscience above, because that would be especially terrifying for me. And, how can I know for sure I don't have it? I'm depressed, because I'm worried: "what if I'm lost forever?" That's really depressing.
Is there hope for me? I really want hope.
I think your reply could literally change my life.
Sorry for another long comment, and possible spelling mistakes.
And thank you for all that you're doing, and thank you in advance!
Hi again, Dan,
Thanks for writing. I want you to know that you are not alone in your worries. I have talked to dozens and dozens of others who express the exact same concerns. I know it can feel so strange and isolating to have these intense worries, and maybe you have been unable to share your thoughts with anyone in your church or family. But I assure you, there are so, so many in the religious OCD community who would come and pat you on the shoulder and say, “me too.” So first of all, please feel the concentrated love and support of myself and the 4,000 others who are regular readers of this website.
Secondly, let me respond to your concern about not having the right feelings. I would like to point out that emotions are not a requirement for salvation. “We walk by faith, not by sight.” Feelings are very poor indicators of our true standing with God. Remember when Elijah was running away from the evil queen Jezebel? He was depressed and suicidal. He asked God to let him die, because he “felt” so horrible. But it was in that moment that God hid him in the mountain and actually showed Himself to Elijah in the still small voice!! Wow, what a privilege, to meet God–and yet, He met God in an incredibly intimate way when his own feelings were radically “off.” Please go back and read this story. See what God’s “cure” for Elijah was. Not condemnation, and not a big lecture. God sent an angel to give him food and rest (translation: SELF CARE!!) and God poured out His presence. Then He gave Him a word of encouragement that there were still 7,000 who had not bowed the knee to Baal. Our role when our feelings are not behaving is to just push through by faith. We need to remember to prioritize self-care, rest, and healthy living (please be sure you are eating a nutritious diet, sleeping regularly, and getting outside to walk or exercise). The feelings of joy, spiritual longing, or passion are God’s to give, not ours to manufacture. Please guard against thinking you must be an emotion factory to “produce” the right feelings. We must seek God (this is a CHOICE, not a feeling) and if/when He wants, He will reward us with good feelings.
Secondly, about motivation. There are a lot of reasons people might be motivated to seek God. Let me summarize a long story and say it does not matter what your motivation is for seeking God. We must come, and when we come, He will change whatever needs changing. But if we remain away until we feel that we have “fixed” ourselves and our motivation, we will never come. Think of all the reasons people came to Jesus. When Nicodemus came, he was curious and confused. When Bartimaus came, it was for physical healing. When the demoniac came, rushing upon Him at the beach, it was to frighten Him away. When the disciples came, it was for worldly honor and position. But none of this matters to Jesus. All of us have messed up motivations. We come, and He changes us. And by the way, a fear motivation is not necessarily a bad thing. Fear often drives people to God, and this is totally normal and Biblical. In Jude 1:22, it says “on some have compassion…but others save with fear.” Different people are drawn by different means. Some will be drawn to Christ through the kind compassion of a true Christian, while others will be drawn to Christ by somber thoughts of what may be coming in the future. Again, motivation is not something to worry about for now. You can pray like this: “dear Lord, I think my motives are pretty messed up, but you knew that already. I am here seeking you, Lord, even with all my issues. Will you please fix them? Will you make my motives pure? I trust your grace to make a miracle in my soul.”
And yes, to answer your third and fourth points, there is hope for you. There is no sinner who has messed up so badly that there is no cure in the gospel. Psalm 3 says,”Many are they who say of me, ‘There is no help for him in God.’ But You, O Lord, are a shield for me, My glory and the One who lifts up my head.” One of my clients was recently sharing this passage with me. She just had a major breakthrough in knowing how to deal with the intrusive thoughts and ruminations. She told me that this passage meant a lot to her because all the intrusive thoughts were telling her, “there is no help for you in God.” But she had to press on in faith and recognize that God is a shield to us, the one who lifts up our head and gives us hope. Her major breakthrough (she is doing significantly better now) was to ignore these thoughts and allow God to do her fighting for her. I am sure you will have the same experience as well. There is hope. No one is too sinful for the grace of God. Ignore the thoughts and press right on forward towards Christ’s open arms.
May He bless you and give you rich fulfillment.
I am literally in the same boat like you ! I too need to talk to others in groups like this cause it is scary!!
I'm afraid, what if I am a reprobate person? What if I'm lost forever? I'm feeling desperate, it hurts so much I'm afraid and worried. You wrote:
"The litmus test to know if you are a truly reprobate person or merely a scrupulous person is to ask how often you come back to God to seek reconciliation."
I think I've been backsliding, and since unwanted intrusive thoughts started things got much worse. I used to come back to God to seek reconciliation a lot. But after some time, I guess I kinda gave up in a sense. Of course, I want to come back to God and get closer to God. But I think I messed up a lot, I think for a long period I didn't come back to God to seek reconciliation often enough, and I'm sorry.
I think there's a reason for that, which is weird. And I feel like it's blocking me, isn't letting me come back to God:
I've been having a problem with pornography for just too long. I'm so stupid makes me hate myself sometimes, because I masturbated knowing it's bad, repeatedly, too much. Just hope that God can forgive me.
About the OCD I feel like it doesn't even make sense.
It started maybe over a year ago? Not sure. When I was being stupid as usual and was masturbating with pornography. But then something awful happened: I had an unwanted intrusive thought about God/Jesus, a REALLY bad one, and worse, a visual one, I might be traumatized, it came out of nowhere, in the worst timing possible.
So, that's a problem. I want to forget about it, my last masturbation can't be like this, I don't want to remember it and remember that my last one was this bad, that's a trauma.
So what I've been trying to do is to start and finish a masturbation/pornography without having an unwanted intrusive thought or any bad thought, so I can finally stop it. But if you're familiar with OCD, you know that if you try to not think about something, or avoid it or worry about it, you end up thinking about it. When you try to fight a thought, it backfires. So I'm still stuck, it's like OCD got me captured.
So that's my objective right now. I've even bought a book about dealing with Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts, I have researched on the internet, and watched videos on Youtube.
And because of that I find it hard to get back/closer to God. I feel like I can't pray to God asking for forgiveness, because in order to eliminate this OCD problem, I think I have to sin. But if I don't eliminate this OCD problem, I may keep worrying, obsessing about it and keep feeling anxious and stressed. Yeah, I might be the only one with a stupid problem like this.
So I guess my plan may be:
1. Start and finish a masturbation/porn without a single unwanted intrusive thought, or bad thought.
And when I finally do that:
2. Try to get back/closer to God again, and now fight against masturbation/porn.
This might be confusing. I'm confused too. I'd appreciate help with this.
I just want to get back/closer to God again. But for that I think I will have to eliminate this stupid OCD problem first.
Please help me.
I’m glad you’re here, and I’m glad you’re talking through these things. The bravest thing we can do when we recognize we need help is to reach out. And believe me, God sees your heart and knows it better than you know yourself. Heaven rejoices every time you reach out towards God, even if your hand is weak and trembling.
In response to your struggles with pornography and masturbation, please do remember that addiction and OCD have high correlation. There is some discussion about whether addictions are caused/intensified by the unique brain wiring of OCD, or whether our addictions are simply something we turn to in order to escape OCD’s anxiety. In my work with many different clients, I have seen both to be true for different people. In your case, it seems that your addiction to porn and masturbating is not being used as an “escape mechanism” but instead has become inextricably linked to your struggle with intrusive thoughts (i.e. you want your “last session” to NOT involve a religious intrusive thought so you can have a feeling of making a clean break with it). Thus, each session with porn/masturbation is essentially functioning as a compulsion.
Your two-step plan is admirable, but I believe it will not be effective. First of all, step one will be difficult to achieve because of what you have already noted: trying to fight a thought will always backfire. Let me call your attention to something you may have not thought about yet. What is it that keeps drawing you back to the porn/masturbation compulsion? It is a particular FEELING. It’s a feeling that you didn’t do it “right” last time and must reach a sense of completion or perfection in order to move on to step two of your plan. Think hard and try to isolate this feeling. Do you know what I’m talking about? Each repeat session is an attempt to “solve” this bad feeling so that you grant yourself permission to move on. The key here is realizing that this feeling will NEVER COME. Instead, you must embrace the swampy, yucky feeling and resolve to push forward to Christ. Remember, God is like a shower: He receives you just as you are, dirty and all covered with filth–but like the shower, He does not LEAVE you that way! But you must come, come as you are, with all your struggles and that horrible feeling that you haven’t done it “right” the last time.
As for step two, I would like to point your attention to the words you are using. You speak of “trying to get back/closer to God again” and then “fight” against masturbation/porn. Let me remind you that before the idea even entered your mind, Christ was trying to get close to YOU. Like the shepherd leaves the 99 sheep in the fold and goes out in the wilderness to seek that one lost sheep, He has been moving all heaven to rescue you from sin, anxiety, and suffering. He hears your cries for help, and already has an immense rescue team working on your behalf. You may think you must “fight” these addictive behaviors, but Exodus 14:14 reminds us that “the Lord shall fight for you, and you shall hold your peace.” Raise your hand of faith through the gloom you are experiencing right now and cling to the promises of what God will do for you, in you, and with you. You do not need to clean up your act before God accepts you. He is already beside you with arms open wide, and He will carry you through the obsessions, compulsions, and addictive tendencies that you and all of us in the OCD community struggle with.
Take care my friend and I pray God will lift your spirits and bring you to His side.
hi thank you very much for this i’ve been so scared about my thoughts. a few months ago I saw a post not to use “lol” because it meant “lu$ifer our lord.” ever since then that thought has been in my head and i’ve repeated lu$ifer is not lord over and over again… but i’m scared that when I was telling my parents about this I accidentally said that he was just to tell them what was stuck in my head. is this committing the unforgivable sin?
Don’t worry, this is not the unpardonable sin. 🙂 Not according to the Biblical definition. But OCD will try to make you think it is.
Thanks for this info, but I'm still not entirely sure about how to deal with my blasphemous thoughts. I'm fairly sure my thoughts are probably the result of OCD, since I've had intrusive thoughts about other unrelated things as well. I constantly get intrusive thoughts about Jesus' miracles not being done by the Holy Spirit, essentially the Pharisees' blasphemy against the Spirit but these thoughts don't come willingly. I don't know if my heart's just so hard that I can't be convinced of the truth or if they are just intrusive thoughts. It's hard to even read the New Testament when I'm constantly having thoughts of blasphemy against the Spirit and so not being fully convinced of Jesus' divinity. I don't know how I'm supposed to ignore these thoughts when saying something as simple as "Jesus is God and the Messiah" immediately causes these thoughts to pop up and I end up engaging with them anyway and I end up repeating stuff to convince myself that those blasphemies aren't true, which barely helps. Even when I try to say that the devil performing miracles doesn't make sense because he can't do the genuine miracles that Jesus did, a nonsensical thought saying that God let him pops up. None of these "refutations" against Jesus being divine make any sense but they persist in my head anyway. Any advice would be appreciated.
Yeah I've dealt with this but my mind would just say Jesus name in vain and I would fight it by saying Jesus is King, but they are half hearted attempts and more a reflex to reduce the guilt I feel by it. But now I realize that works are not what God sees, and he will forgive. He knows your intentions more than you do. If you don't give any more thought to them, they will eventually go away I think.
Thanks for your comments, Tim. I agree!
Jaimie, thank you, thank you, thank you so much for your helpful, kind, graceful words. I feel so much better about my blasphemous intrusive thoughts
First of all thank you for all these informations. I appreciate them very much.But I have a question. Do I need to apologise to God and the people who I hurt when I had intrusive thoughts about them? But sometimes as I apologise the more the bad thoughts pop out. They are really annoying. And sometimes there are so much of these intrusive thoughts I can’t apologise for each of them. If yes I’ll just spend my whole life apologising. And it’s pretty tiring. And as I apologise the more the intrusive thoughts pop out so it never ends. And I don’t feel like apologising. Can u pls help me and guide me? I’m very lost. Tq Jamie
The short answer is no, you don’t need to apologize to people when weird thoughts pop into your mind about them.
I will try to put together a blog post for you on this topic, since I think the longer answer will be of help to many people. Thank you for giving me the idea. 🙂
My friend has tourettes and I was telling him about blasphemy, and he started saying the word uncontrollably but not horribly, and eventually started combining the word blasphemy with other profane swear words. He continued to do this after me encouraging him to stop and then eventually made a sexual joke about God and the Holy Spirit. It was profane and I had been telling him too stop but I smiled at the joke knowing I shouldn't have but I was telling him to stop as that happened. And he felt bad as did I and I am really scared that I committed blasphemy against the Holy Spirit because I smiled/laughed at the joke. I also was laughing when he was saying blasphemy combined with other swear words and felt bad and kept telling him to stop and told him I know he has tourettes and its hard to control it but yeah. I feel bad and I have OCD and continue to have Blasphemous thoughts but I am starting to think my blasphemous thoughts are from OCD. So two questions, is it Blasphemy if I have blasphemous thoughts, and also was it Blasphemy against the Holy Spirit to smile/laugh at his joke.
We all make mistakes. Laughing at a bad or inappropriate joke happens. In these moments, we go to the Lord and ask His forgiveness and believe that the blood of Jesus cleanses us from all sin. When we rise from our knees, we do so in complete freedom, because He has graciously cast our sins into the depths of the sea.
We sometimes have the idea that a blunder or mistake or misspoken word against the Holy Spirit is unforgivable while other kinds of sins can be pardoned. As if the Holy Spirit is that one “untouchable” area of our relationship with God that can never be breached. We treat God as if He is a human being like us–I think all of us know complicated people who will “unfriend” you for talking about that one specific thing that bothers them. But God is not like that, and the Holy Spirit actually takes a whole lot of abuse. The Holy Spirit has the thickest skin of anyone in the universe. He is the One who bears long with us, constantly wooing our hearts to God even when we are lost and enamored with our sins. The Holy Spirit bears with us when we ignore God, when we make poor choices, and yes, even when we blaspheme. It is a misconception to see the Holy Spirit in such delicate terms, as if any small thing will tick Him off.
I recommend praying very simply to say, “I’m sorry, I feel bad that I laughed at a bad joke. I know it was a mistake, but I also know that You still love me. Please forgive me and help me find a better way of dealing with it in the future.”
Hope this helps.
I have OCD and am having blasphemous thoughts. Will I be forgiven for having thoughts about blasphemy against the Holy Spirit? Also, I am scared that maybe I committed blasphemy in the past against the Holy Spirit as a child (im 15 now) and I don't remember. Will I be forgiven? Also is it blasphemy against the Holy Spirit if I said the f word in this sentence: Im making another ******** Christmas card."
Sorry I know this sounds silly probably. I just get very anxious and worried sometimes.
Thinking about blaspheming the Holy Spirit is not the same as actually blaspheming. The essence of what Jesus was talking about when He made those tough statements about the unpardonable sin related to a long-term, consistent resistance of truth (truth is brought to the mind by the Holy Spirit, see John 16). Christianity does not teach that there is any magical power in mantras, phrases, or spooky “abracadabra” words–neither to save us nor condemn us. Salvation and condemnation are the result of our long-term choices, choices we make day after day. Having curse words pop into your mind would be something I’d hesitate to classify as a sin. In psychology terms, we’d call it an “intrusive thought.” In spiritual terms, we’d call it a “temptation.” Either way, we can respond the same way: we turn our eyes away from self and focus on Christ. Focusing inward leads to rumination and self-condemnation, and it is not helpful. When we are tempted to speak evil words, remember that Jesus was also tempted. We can thank Him that we may also struggle as He struggled and we may grow stronger through each experience.
Thank you so so much. That really helped
You’re most welcome! Be blessed!
can you please approve my other comment? Im really stressed out about it and am dying for an answer sorry I know Im being rude
I'm not sure how to tell my parents… don't want to disapoint them…
Please don’t feel bad about telling your parents. OCD is often called the “hidden disease” because we are always ashamed or scared to tell anyone about it. That’s why it ends up taking an average of 10 years for people to get the intervention and help they need. 10 years!! Don’t let that be you, Amy. This is not your fault and it isn’t something to be ashamed of. Talk to them about your struggles. I’m sure they will support you and be your biggest cheerleading team!
Hey Are these Articles in Spanish too? I have a sister in Christ who really needs to read this. She has been twitching , thinking they following her, feels guilty depressed, so many thing, she has even stop going to church. I think she needs a doctor. Do you know any doctor located in Bronx, NY that is really good with these themes?
Oooh, I really wish I could speak/write in Spanish. But perhaps you can translate for her. Unfortunately I don’t know any mental health providers in New York that specialize in scrupulosity, although I’m sure there are some. It would just be a matter of searching for OCD specialists and then sorting out the ones who are familiar with religious OCD themes.
I have been having issues with blasphemous thoughts for many many years. I have always noticed that they become more and more instense or perverted when I am trying to get closer to God. In times of prayer or bible reading. I have cried out to God many times about this and I don't know what to do. On three different times they were so bad I felt like he was rebuking me. It felt like he was saying "do you know who I am to think such a thing" and this weekend it felt like He took his presence and took a long time to forgive me. At this moment, I am currently spiritually shut down because I feel like if I avoid the praying and the reading I can avoid the thoughts. However, this cannot really be a solution either. I feel like I am in a catch 22 situation. No good comes from staying away from God because you fall into old sin like in my case gluttony. I feel so much despair and somwhat suicidal but I fear hell. I really don't know what to do.
I hope you don't mind me replying to your comment. I feel like we are in the same boat. The more I try to become closer to God and unite myself to Christ the more these blasphemous thoughts would come into my mind. Often these thoughts were so painful that my body would twitch and I would let out a groan. I thought I was going crazy. I thought I was alone and that I could not discuss these feelings with anyone, not even a priest.
As I grew up in a religious household I have given my life to Christ several times. I would have these thoughts and fall away with a feeling of what's the use. That's when these thoughts would subside. As soon as I try to come back to the Lord these evil thoughts would reemerge. I googled this subject and that's how I stumbled on this article and saw your comment.
I thought I was committing a mortal sin. Even the possibility of the 'unforgivable sin" until I read this article and realized that I wasn't alone. So here is my take on this. (I may be wrong but to me it's logical). For me: The more I commit my self to our Lord Jesus Christ the more the enemy tries to dissuade me. The more he tries to get me to sin and fall away. With me it has worked in the past. He is very cunning and has even made me believe that there was no way that God would ever forgive me trying to reaffirm that with blasphemous thoughts. Don't get me wrong I'm not trying to use the old excuse "The devil made me do it" but I believe that he has power to try to cause us to go astray. That being said I am going to TRY to take Jaimie's advice and TRY to ignore them. Not let them bother me as much knowing that it is not my fault. That i don't invite these thoughts and that God loves me so much that he gave his only begotten Son who shed his blood on the cross and died so our sins are forgiven. This time I am going to dig my heels in. I am not going to go astray and keep going. If Christ can suffer on the cross for my sins I can suffer a little pain until these thoughts dissipate. I hope my reply helps. I will pray for you and ask that you pray for me. Stay strong my sister.
Thank you for responding to my comment. You situation absolutely mirrors mine. I was amazed when you wrote about the twitches and groans. I some cases I physically shake my head in effort to get rid of the thoughts. My efforts to stay away from God did take away the horrible thoughts. Itvis obvious to me now that if they come when I am getting closer to God then they are not from me but from the devil. I am now reconciled back to God and I will see these thoughts for what they are i.e. intrusions from the enemy not me. God bless you richly and I will add you to my prayer list. I am happy for sites like this that will give other silent sufferers hope.
All the best,
I just realized how many typos are contained in the post. Sorry about that. I was typing so fast from my cell phone and did not re-read the comment before posting.
Thank you for the wonderful article. Is there a difference if we start to say the blasphemous thought out loud and then catch ourselves? Mine are typically reactive to some untrue thought that pops into my head, and before I can get my mind to ignore it, I think [or start to say out loud] a blasphemous phrase. I'll typically catch myself on the first or second letter of the first word of the phrase, but I'm not sure if I have to handle this differently.
I have trouble with blasphemous thoughts about the Holy Spirit. When one comes into my head I try to make it into a sentence that is not blasphemous. I live alone and have never said the thoughts out loud. If I never said the thoughts-to myself or others I am safe, right?
Hi, I don't know what to call this but I'm aware of what I'm thinking I mean I'm conscious and thought it willfully, I know I'm thinking about a bad thing and that thought is wrong, it's like the thought is just there, I don't know if it is a ocd. I want to go back to the old me, I want to feel the presence of Lord again, I just can't and don't know if Lord will forgive me. Thank you.
Hello! I have a question. What if these thoughts end up becoming intentional? That’s a fear of mine.
Hi Jaimie, I’ve been on an up and down roller coaster with this OCD issue for I want to say 4 years or so. Every time I have stopped and just let it happen I will get peace. I think the hardest step for me is when I feel as though my faith is weak and I am disconnected from God when I call on the Holy Spirit. It has gotten so bad that I actually struggle to read the Bible not because I don’t want to. But because I constantly get horrible thoughts whenever I read it. I think this all started happening when I made it very clear that I was done with my old sinful ways and finally decided to start on my path to becoming a pastor. I used to get drunk, have premarital sex, smoke pot, chew tobacco, and God helped me through it all when I kept praying for help from Him to do it. I already worry it will happen When I get ready to read the word. The same occurs of course whenever I come to a spot in scripture that talks about the Holy Spirit. Now I worry that if I don’t do this or that or if I commit this sin or if I eat that, God will not help me through this and will allow me to suffer. I know it probably sounds silly even as I am writing this but I just really don’t want to lose my salvation or lose my faith in Jesus. One other thing too is I constantly worry that if I don’t say “May the lord Jesus Christ bless you today.” Or I don’t talk to everybody around me about Jesus then God will be angry with me or punish me as if I am ashamed of Jesus. I just want it to come naturally to me when I bring up my faith. As I write this down I actually have this sense of relief from just writing it and bringing my problems out into the open. I have a lot of questions lol but I think that these questions for you personally is a good start in talking to somebody. God bless you for this relieving and helpful article too!
Hi, Nick! Your experience sounds quite familiar, and I know what you mean about feeling better to just get it out in the open. My first comment to your situation would relate to what you’ve said about not wanting to read the Bible because you know you’ll get irrational feelings of anxiety. What I have observed is that people who have religious OCD fall into one of two categories (or sometimes flip flop between both) either the engaged obsessive or the avoidant obsessive. We either overly-engage with compulsive spiritual practices, or compulsively AVOID them out of fear of anxiety rising up. It sounds like you may be in that “avoidant” camp. The answer to this is to recognize that avoidance can, in and of itself, become a compulsion. The best way to respond to that is to gently push yourself, bit by bit, to read your Bible even if you get feelings of anxiety. Recognize that these negative feelings will not hurt you, even though they are very uncomfortable. (For the engaged obsessive who spends 8 hours per day in religious rituals and can’t stop, I tell them to back off and do less. But for you, I will say to do more, as you’re able to handle it. We want our FAITH to make decisions, not our FEELINGS, so we always want to give a bit of pushback to our compulsions so they don’t call all the shots.)
And you’re also making sense about those tormenting feelings about possibly losing your salvation or committing the unpardonable sin. Beyond what I’ve already written in this article, just know that you’re not alone in this fear. However, the EXTENT to which you are experiencing this fear is predominantly an OCD thing, not a faith thing.
This article is incredible. Can you please help me out with a question? Could you explain further the types of thoughts that will go along to the beat of sounds? And why do they go along with sounds?
I have been trying to articulate this for years and couldn't. You wrote it perfectly. That is exactly what I experience.
I have gotten into a habit of over riding all the sounds I hear. Is there a cure for this thought-sounds mix?
This is a fascinating question, which I admit I don’t have a snazzy scientific answer for at this point. 🙂 But I do know exactly what you’re talking about…sometimes I drum my fingers to certain patterns that are “in my head” at various times of the day. I have no clue WHY this happens, but I’ve talked to others who have thoughts that coincide with certain sounds, movements, or breathing patterns. I don’t know why this happens, but it’s semi-common and certainly deserves further investigation. I’ll tuck it into the back of my mind and put out more info on it if I get any lightbulb moments! Thanks for bringing it up!
Thanks for responding. You're awesome!
It is a super interesting And bothering Ocd thing that ultimately leads me to severe thought suppression.
I'm dealing better with it these days.
Nice job, Keep it up!
Well I have been dealing with intrusive thoughts for about 13 years. They have a powerful hold over me and have cause a lot of damage.
This started for me when I was about 19 or 20 years of age. I was a Christian but living in sin. My church decided to excommunicate me and never accepted me back. I fell into a terrible anxiety ridden deep depression. I reached out to a pastor friend of mine and he decided to invite to his church. We spent a year trying to reconcile with my old church and they wouldn't take me back. My dad even disowned me for a period. Since that point, I started to get thoughts I would always say aren't mine. They were so foreign and against what I believed, against the person I truly am. I would fight and fight against them but never left. They caused great fear and anxiety. They would leave me in great doubt. These thoughts started about doubting my salvation. Anytime, I messed up, I would doubt my salvation. It later morphed to hearing thoughts of "God isn't really", "you don't believe in him". I would get these randomly or when I would read God's word. I didn't know what I do now. It was so bad, I ran away from God. When I did, the thoughts and pain stopped. I walked away from the Lord for over seven years. Six years ago, I came back to the Lord and then met my wife. Since then, the thoughts have never left. I feel like they have destroyed my faith. I am left in great doubt wondering if they are just my own thoughts or false. I feel like I have lost the battle to them. That these thoughts have become my reality or my true way of thinking. There is something inside that I cling to "I know whom I've trusted and believed in". I hold to this truth, but the other thoughts are so powerful. Now the thoughts have morphed into doubting my salvation, fearful of the rapture and being left behind, wondering how I could ever be a believer and have these thoughts. Even my anxiety itself conjures these. I want freedom, healing, peace, and joy. I want to honor and please God, serve him with full faith, yet these rob me of everything. I wonder to myself who I'd be without these terrible thoughts. Wondering if I found relief, would my faith return or would my doubts take hold and forever damn me. I pray for God to restore my faith and deliver me from this, but he doesn't. He hasn't for all of these years and I don't know my. I feel as if he has let me go. As if, I have gone too far, or was never really his.
These has ruined my life and I don't know what to do about it anymore. I still fight them in hopes someday they'll disappear but they don't.
What do you think? Can I find healing from this or am I too far gone?
Thank you for describing your struggle — I’m sure there are dozens of other readers who would resonate completely with your story. No, I definitely don’t believe you’re “too far gone.” No one is beyond the reach of God’s mercy and healing!
One thing your story does illustrate is the impact of spiritual trauma on our thought life. Spiritual trauma is one of the six hit categories I talk with my clients about — it is the least common of the six, but when it is present, it can be very impactful. Scientists suggest that about 50% of OCD is biological and other half is environmental. It can therefore be entirely possible to have all the genetic predispositions to OCD but not really manifest or have an issue. You’ve noted that these thoughts began after a very traumatic spiritual experience (excommunication and shunning is probably the second worst type of spiritual trauma, after being abused by clergy). Now, what I’m NOT saying is that trauma “causes” OCD. There isn’t a lot of evidence for that. You’ve probably had genetic predispositions to obsessive compulsive behavior long before that episode, but this may have triggered a more intense development. As I’m not a scientific expert, we can leave the nuanced discussions for the laboratory — but what I can tell you is that in my work I do frequently see more intense OCD symptoms beginning after traumatic episodes like you’ve described. It probably has something to do with new layers of thoughts and views of self that are introduced at that time. To reverse these beliefs involves an in-depth exploration of your identity in Christ, the character of God, and your own relationship with doubt, guilt, and control.
Know this: you can heal from this. It may take time, but you can find the way out.
God’s blessings always,
hey,recently i’ve been having really really evil thoughts about Jesus which are sexual i feel shame explaining but i just need help,they include Jesus doing something to me that is sexual and a crime i think you get the idea and now that i have thought about jt it’s like it’s in my brain now and it’s labelled if you know what i mean(it’s the R word and i have so much shame and guilt i jusr need help i hate myself) it’s like it won’t go that’s now what i think of Jesus even though it definitely not i pray all the time asking for help and i read my Bible and they just come back ,i’m still young and i’ve never had a mental illness and i’m scared that these are my thoughts because it’s like i encourage them but i don’t want to i don’t want to label Jesus like that i Love him and he’s my saviour i’m just scared i’m an evil person that doesn’t deserve Gods love at all
Thank you for the article aswell it was really helpful
Hey,God understands and loves you he will get you through this keep having faith and PRAY PRAY PRAY
Thank you so much I have been trying to find answers on why I have been having blasphemous thoughts in my head and when I found this article it gave me all the answers to my Question thank you so much
You’re most welcome! God bless you!
Hello jaimie, please help I accidentally blasphemed Jesus, so basically a blasphemous thought came into my head saying something really bad to Jesus and Holy Spirit and my family, so I try to ignore it and praise Jesus I know this sounds weird but the thought was the opposite of this “I want Jesus to go to heaven” I accidentally said the opposite (I think you may know what I accidentally said) (the blasphemous thought) I freaked out and asked for forgiveness… will god forgive me? I don’t know what to do… this has happened so many times where I accidentally blasphemed god or the Holy Spirit like so many times were I accidentally say the “mean” word.. instead of the “king” word…. sorry.. I just am scared for my future and what’s gonna happen to me… I don’t wanna go to hell…do you think god understands I never intend to say these thoughts.. please help. :’(
I think he dose , sometimes you get your thoughts twisted like you would you tounge , this happens to me ,
I’m having trouble on defining weather there sinful or intrusive thoughts cause there in my internal dialogue too like I repeat the same things everyday I feel so helpless on this I know I’m terrified but I don’t feel terrified anxious I’m scared definitely but there in my head I would never say these things out loud because I know then it’s for sure I’m toast I just want some clarity I care about my future with God and don’t want these thoughts at all not in any shape or form I keep relapsing on meth to also cause I don’t feel ok in my brain and I know that’s not ok either I’m going to seek help on this I keep asking God for forgiveness but don’t feel like I get it will explain more in next email if possible
I have a therapist and I’ve also been diagnosed with PTSD and schizophrenia this all occurred after spiritual attack of voices and etc I don’t want to ever give up on God never ever but I think he’s had it with me and I think I really have done the unforgivable sin cause my heads not right and my heart isn’t either I just want him to speak to me and tell me everything is going to be ok I’m at Gods mercy you guys are experts at this how will I know
Same I wish someone wrote a book about this bc reading the comments were all going through THE SAME THING AND FEELINGS! Not everyone of course but we all have similarities and it makes me feel more normal …. I think there’s different fazes to this …….
Hi Jamie, a little about me: I'm 19 years old and on the autistic spectrum. This article really helped me on where I stand with the unpardonable sin. When I try to say something praiseworthy of God/Jesus, the sentence becomes mixed in with something else which will make it sound incredibly blasphemous. Tho I've never been diagnosed with OCD,I've done research on OCD and Scrupulosity in particular, and I pretty much share all the symptoms. New blasphemous thoughts/images appear in my mind such as proclaiming the devil as good when I meant to say bad and saying that he's god and say in my head that Jesus is God over and over again. My fighting with my blasphemous thoughts is like a broken record. Even tho I know God knows all my thoughts, I still feel guilty. Like why would I allow my that in my head. Afterwards, my head will feel tight after what seems like forever to fight these thoughts. I would feel fine for a while but once the said blasphemous thought passes, I'll go back to feeling guilty and scared again. I know WELL that God knows my thoughts, but have strong feelings that he hates me.
It’s not uncommon for people with scrupulosity to fight all day with their thoughts and still feel like God hates them. Please take a look at my article, “God Hates Me: Uncovering the Hidden Root of Scrupulosity.” I hope this will speak more deeply to that particular feeling.
Hello! This helped a lot! But, when I was reading about the Chemosh story, those intrusive thoughts came. Then, I tried fighting it and said in my mind that Jesus is Lord. But then I almost accidentally said in my mind the Chemosh is Lord, (it’s like those intrusive thoughts are a back voice and my thoughts are a front voice) and that was in my front voice! Can I be forgiven?
When your thoughts get mixed up because of the OCD, that is not sin. God understands the weaknesses of our broken brains and is not holding you accountable for it any more than He would judge a low-IQ person for not understanding complex theological thoughts. It is in situations like these — when your brain seems to say something that frightens you — when you need to not fight against it, but rather lean into the Biblical truth that your prayers and spiritual affirmations are not what saves you. JESUS saves you. Being able to say a fancy, perfect prayer or affirmation of faith is not the point. Remember that Scripture tells us that the Holy Spirit makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. The Holy Spirit translates our confused thoughts into a beautiful aroma before the throne of God. Lean into that. Trust in Him, not in self. The cure for religious OCD involves an ever-increasing ability to let go of my spiritual self-dependence and cling fully on the merits of Christ.
Thank you. I feels as though I’m going through each one of the examples of those blasphemous thoughts. Right now I’m on the urges to pray and worship the enemy. A thought came in that said “I sold my soul to the enemy”. It got me extremely scared and thought that that thought actually cause me to actually do what the thought was. And now I have urges to worship the enemy and it’s really frustrating.
I actually have a question. So I’m pretty sure the blasphemous thoughts are gone. My blasphemous thoughts were a lot about the Holy Spirit and bad thoughts about Him. If my bad thoughts about the Holy Spirit were intentional, could I be forgiven? Like now I feel like I’m upset with the Holy Spirit and I don’t know why.
Hiya thank god for the intercession through you in writing this article ,you’ve helped so many brothers and sisters in Christ including me ,praise be to his ,so many fears and doubts and anxiety has been calmed and stilled , however I still need advice on this ,I was at a church meeting ,I was really feeling the holy spirits presence within the meeting however when I asked the leader of the meeting to pray for Jesus to deliver me from intrusive unwanted thoughts and fear of blasphemy thoughts ,as the man started praying for me I had one of them thoughts thinking this is fake ,which has since made me feel worse ,is this blasphemy ? I feel like I’m overcoming many other intrusive thoughts ,thank god thank Christ ,but whenever I think of this particular situation I become so fearful and discouraged Again ,I pray my lord Jesus Christ can answer me and assure me and guide me 🙏
I think it’s quite common for intrusive thoughts to involve questions of “reality.” We may wonder if the important elements of our faith are fake, if reality is fake, and basically everything that possible to question, we question. You may wish to check out my recent article on Religious OCD and Existential OCD. I wouldn’t consider it anything to worry about. God doesn’t mind us wondering about if things are real or fake. The important thing for Him is that we actually take the step of faith and move forward in our Christian decisions/actions, even if we have questions and doubts popping up in our minds.
Thank you for this article. My thought pattern recently is not as dramatic as some. How it can about: recently I was speaking with a brother in Christ about the meaning of blaspheming the Holy Spirit as written in Matthew. How this is a deliberate, final searing act of defiance and rejection so great, it’s as if angels in heaven denied the Holy Spirit; that is how deliberate and severe this act is.
We discussed the passage, and I read scripture with fear and trembling; my only following thoughts the next day was, “I am so fearful of this sin, I don’t ever want to get near it or talk about it – all I want to do is serve my King.”
That created anxiety from suppression. I then started getting unwanted thoughts along the lines of “say you blasphemed the Holy Spirit” or just “blaspheme the Holy Spirit”.
My immediate response was what you described, knees hit the floor in repentant prayer and asking for the Lord to cleanse my mind. I’m now reeling from the aftermath of this. I know that this isn’t actually blaspheming the Holy Spirit as it is not a foreign or passive thought, it has to be the most deliberate and clear conscious action. Something I fear and tremble over to not commit.
A quick background on me: I do have subclinical levels of anxiety and traces of OCD behavior (very minor). I also do believe that supernatural forces can manipulate our mental and physical medical states. And the enemy is trying to sow chaos and rob the joy of our salvation. But it still is hard. Prayers and practical therapy is needed.
Thank you and God bless
I defiantly understand the worry about the unpardonable sin. It’s really frustrating.
Soooooo, this article helped a lot. I’ve been battling this for about a year .. I want to walk in Gods love for me but this situation has just really been an ongoing issue .
But – I know God has a plan for my life . I have battled with doubt and uncertainty and really despair but God is stronger .
If you could send me more tips.
Idk how to BELIEVE that God loves me .. I want to be solidified in my faith. I have felt like I was a screw up. Sinned too far .. and it’s really tried to kill my prayer life . BUT God is bigger so I will continue to speak life .
I just want to really believe it in my heart .my pastors tell me what God says to them about me all the time. I’ve had Him speak to me .. and I still question . I don’t want to reject Him… or always be in a place where I’m questioning Him. Any suggestions ?
Also is it possible that this can affect your sleep? I often don’t get tired or it takes a lot for me to wind down..
Hi, thanks for expressing your feelings about how this is affecting you. I’m sure many others can relate.
My best advice for you is to remember that obsessive-compulsive disorder sparks your brain to constantly get stuck on possible dangers. That’s the feeling you get that something ambiguous is wrong and you aren’t quite sure what, but you’ve got to do something to restore a sense of “ok-ness” again. The constant feeling like you’ve done something wrong, God doesn’t love you, you’ve sinned to far…these are not based on evidence, they are based on this nebulous feeling. But faith can reach beyond all these feelings. Tell yourself, “this is not me, it’s my OCD. These feelings tell me nothing accurate about my spiritual life.”
Remember also that Jesus Himself endured some very uncomfortable feelings — think about what He went through in the Garden of Gethsemane. He “felt” like God did not love Him anymore and that they would be separated forever, but this was not the case. Sometimes we get feelings that are not an accurate reflection of reality, and this does not make us “less” of a believer. You are ok, even when you don’t feel ok. Keep holding onto Christ and you will make it through.
Good day i was once an honest servant God five years back, i preached and taught people about hells and many other things, i then fell along the way and lose direction a d went back to women and sex, alcohol and all sorts of things, i hardened my conscious and continued to do all sorts of evil things but during lockdown i just began to have thoughts of going to hell and this triggered the old me in christ and i began to realize all i really did to God, i then decided to ask forgiveness from God for ever leaving him and asked to be restored, i had a problem with leaving the girl i was with but invited her with me and she agreed, then we talked to a Pastor and agreed that we will do things Godly and enter into a courtship but after i sloved that evil imagination began coming into my head by having imagining sexual and evil thoughts about God and Jesus Christ, it has been about five months in the struggle i sometimes get better and go back again if i hear e message about hells and i start self condemnation saying that there is no way God can accept me like this, so my Gult is that maybe this thoughts are brought because of what i exposed myself into such as pornography, sex with multiple partners and all exposures to evil things, but after seeking help and reading things online this article i think it will makw a difference
Thank you very much for sharing your experience — I know it will be a blessing to others who will read it. One of the biggest lies of scrupulosity is that “all guilt is true guilt.” Actually, there is such a thing as false guilt. We know this from 2 Corinthians 7, which speaks about “godly sorrow” (which leads to a real change in our behaviors) and “the sorrow of the world” (which only leads to death). When you repented and made a complete turnaround in your life — choosing by the power of God to leave your old lifestyle behind and shift your relationship into more godly boundaries, your guilty feelings served the correct purpose. They served to change your direction and bring you to Christ. The Bible promises that “if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).
1 Corinthians 6 gives a list of sinful behaviors that will not be found in the kingdom of God, but notice how the Apostle Paul shifts the conversation at the end to show how forgiveness works. He writes,
Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.
And such WERE some of you. That’s past tense. Then we have this word, “but.” That means there’s a big difference now. Something changed. What was it? You were washed, sanctified, and justified in the name of Jesus. Therefore, any guilty feelings that you have after this point about the past is considered false guilt. It no longer serves the helpful function of true guilt, and you may cast it away. God has already accepted you — these feelings of false guilt are either A) a temptation from Satan to doubt your faith experience, or B) the obsessive thought patterns of religious OCD. In either case, it is safe to ignore false guilt.
I wish you the best as you move forward and rejoice in the cleansing grace of our Lord Jesus Christ.
I am so glad I found this page. I have been struggling with this for a long time but was able to just ignore most of the attacks for years. I got a trigger back a few months ago I was wondering why Jews today don’t believe in Christ as Messiah, then I started to question Christ myself. This led to intrusive thoughts and thinking I was damned and God either has left me (as if I had committed the unpardonable sin) or I was never a true born again believer. I love God and believe in Jesus and have given my life to him many years ago. I have been tormented for months now. I was finally diagnosed with OCD and Anxiety and so the intrusive thoughts and the crippling fight or flight response is much less severe, however I still few doubt about Jesus (who I know and LOVE). Even when I am reading the Bible I will still feel doubts or questions of him. I hate this and pray and pray for God to open my eyes of my heart to all of His truth again. This becomes a trigger then that maybe I was never really born again, maybe I didn’t accept Jesus correctly etc etc etc. que the insanity here…. I’m exhausted and terrified.
I know I really am a believer and that Jesus was my whole world until this latest attack making me feel completely damned to hell.
Is this part of it too? Is doubting part of OCD? I hate this so much and feel I need to fix this to be able to move forward in my life. Please help.
Doubting is so much a part of OCD that it has been called “the doubting disease.” In fact, there’s a book specifically about scrupulosity that is titled “The Doubting Disease,” but you might pick up more obsessions by reading through it and hearing about what other people obsess over. I would recommend instead that you read Dr. Ian Osborne’s book “Can Christianity Cure Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder?” He is a Christian mental health professional who went through some severe scruples and doubt himself, and developed a unique response called Trust Therapy based on several Christian theologians from the past who seemed to have religious OCD. I highly recommend his book, which will answer much of your concerns.
This is very help full to me I believe I will be clean from this thought Because I am a daughter of holy trinity
I also have these blasphemous thoughts about god or Holy Spirit, but they bother me for the whole day, they don’t ever stop, so I usually find myself repeating words saying ‘I love god’ shaking my head or even trying to harm my self to make them stop, it’s very trying and depressing, I’m not how I used to be when I first started to get real with god, I was happy peaceful and free, but now I feel I’m in a dark dungeon and can’t get out, sometimes, sometime I even accident blurted some thoughts about Jesus and the Holy Spirit trying to stop these thoughts… which made the whole situation even worse… I’m glad to know there is people that go through the same thing I do, and this article was very helpful I hope these thoughts that we have can stop one day, god bless 🙂
Thank you for sharing your experience. Please get help for your self-harming practices! There is no evidence that self-harm can stop intrusive thoughts. There are much healthier ways of getting them to go away, but harm is not one of them. Please, please, if you are in danger, take yourself to the hospital or ask a family member for help.
On the topic of verbalizing these bad thoughts, it’s something I discuss in a video about religious intrusive thoughts. Caving in is a sign of exhaustion, not agreement. Please take a look at the video, as I think it will be very helpful for you.
God bless ❤️❤️❤️
I'm sorry to tell you this, but in my case this scrupulosity thing really makes me almost want to quit. Like yes. He has become more fake even if He is The One i belive in mlre than everything ive ever seen. Im almost shure nobody in this wicked world can have the thoughts of the antichrist and fear that themselves can be that person, and to avoid becoming that(anexiety) only by killing yourself. Prayer didn't help. I once thoutht God did a miracle with me to not kill myself this year..He took the suicide thoughts from awhile. And now they are back with a different form the form that i dont wanna live anymore but not to kill myself. Nothing helped. To be shure everything got worse. And i never killed anybody. And i've already blasphemed Heaven and The Holy Ghost.. everyday in my mind. Without me wanting that.So yeah i think i will burn. And i've doubted the reason of my existance.. and i really, once again tell you, did not harm anyone. Not sexual not murder not.. i even tried to preach some things about Jesus in the past but im not good at doing that so i quitted that. i'm not a born again christian i still have some sins to quit but STILL. This cannot be possible from my point of view i reach this thought everyday that i shouldn't be creeated. Its the worst case ive ever seen. My own. I struggle everyday with suicidal thoughts. I had enough of this bullshit. Quitting every drug told me that these are NOT "demons" as i thought before in my head. And everybody told me no bro nop no demon in you. And i also think i have this thoughts from drugs. So yeah all the guild falls on me because i was using drugs and really nobody i know had ever experienced things like this from weed…..and also thinking that everybody is constantly looking inside your mind.. and the fear that everything ive ever done will be revealed on somelike big screen on The Great Judgement Day. Including these thoughts. Of course i think mostly i will burn. And i wished from along time to be dead. And i don't commit suicide. Because i live for Him and for people who love me. I'm crying right now.. I'm not the antichrist!
Ive even accepted Christ as my Lord and Saviour.
And still don't feel the real world. The universe around me.. and i often think i already in fact died and im in hell because hell is a place of confusion just as i experience everything.
God bless you! Hope you will be okay. You and your family.
And i kinda feel gulilt and regret that i said that He becamed more fake.. and i also think that He leaved me in 2017. .these thoughts are not okay.. those are results. The results of fighting this demon to the point where death will be the ultimate solution to this ocd. And i love Him the most i feel like i did something very wrong of telling He had becamed more fake please help me.. at least pray if you see the messages.. my mind is like hell..i actually still believe in God(Him).
OCD is indeed very difficult. In the past, before I knew that I had scrupulosity and existential OCD, I also had bouts with major depressive disorder and suicidal thoughts. So I can understand at least a part of what you’re going through. It’s a very painful place to be — but not a hopeless place. There is always hope. You will pull through this.
I believe God is working in your life and was surely the One who kept you back from hurting yourself. He is not the One condemning you, either. “God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved” (John 3:17).
Hi. I am going through that situation also. And the thoughts I have are mental images of bestiality. I don't know where they came from because it just started some months ago, out of nowhere. I can truly say that I felt traumatised and immediatly felt like God was looking at me with disgust and that I couldn't go to Him anymore. It made me feel so ashamed and it made want to hide from God. Since the beginning of the pandemic, God has isolated me and I was angry, lonely and desperate at first, but I now see it was to fix a lot of issues in my relationship with Him. I have become closer to God than ever before. The lies of the enemy came to the surface and God showed me how really saw Him and how I built my life around lies. It started then, as I grew closer to God. It took a lot to not let the enemy seduce me again with more lies. At first, those thoughts had such a hold of me, I really thought I was going to die from anxiety. I had no choice but to boldly go to God and just be open about it with Him. He told me : "Your thoughts will never separate Me from you". And I felt so much relief. I had to really stand firm on the truth when these thoughts would come along. I spoke to God every time and He let me know that not even one of my thought is good. He knows what is inside of men. This is why He had to die Himself for us. And He loves us with a love that is eternal and undying. These thoughts are from the enemy to try to separate me from God. They still come to me and sometimes, when I am in a vulnerable state, I still feel anxious. But I remember what God told me. And I think about Him and His goodness and perfection, and it calms me down. God taught me that the last thing we want to do is to hide from Him. But it is instinctual with us, like Adam and Eve hid in the trees. This is what man does but God tells us to never withold anything from Him, but trust Him and He will heal and cleanse us. My flesh can never be made perfect. I think God is allowing this to happen to teach and refine us. The enemy always plots to destroy us, but God uses it for good. Thank you for your article, it helped me see that we are all in the same boat and we must encourage one another.
When I kept silent, my bones grew old
Through my groaning all the day long.
For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me;
My vitality was turned into the drought of summer.
I acknowledged my sin to You,
And my iniquity I have not hidden.
I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the LORD,”
And You forgave the iniquity of my sin.
Thank you for this beautiful testimony. I have no doubt that God is working in your life to bring about lasting joy and beauty. One day when you stand upon the sea of glass in the New Jerusalem you will be able to look back and understand perfectly what God was doing in your life all along. Praise God for His continual presence in your life, and thank you for sharing your story!
I am so grateful for this article. I was never diagnosed with OCD but everything explained here I can relate. I've been having this struggle for months now with these unwanted thoughts. Thank you so much. I want to ask so much but I'm really happy for this article and it's clear explanation.
I’m glad you’re able to relate! I hope you were able to find something that will help you make the next step forward.
Hi.. what if i thought of and imagined many times about having sex with the evil… Can you help me with this?
I don’t know if you’re struggling with this anymore, but my advice is to just ask God for forgiveness, and ask God to cleanse your thoughts. If it’s your OCD, again, ask God for help.
me too it been so horrible I wanted to kill myself I hate this I want freedom
Thank you so much for this article !! The first time this happened to me was when I was only 17 years old.I was a devoted Christian my whole life and truly valued my relationship with the Lord.When this intrusive thoughts happened I had no idea where it was coming from,it had just started happening before an extremely important exam.I was in a constant battle against my thoughts.And my anxiety and fear just got worse by the day.It lasted at a point where I became emotional exhausted that I could not even get out of bed for my exam.It was the worst fear ever,because I thought that Jesus has left me,even though in my deepest midst I know this isn’t true,because He said never will I leave you,nor
forsake you.I had no one to tell or talked to because I felt so ashamed and discusted with myself.All I could do was cry,sleep and cry out to the Lord for help ! I was constantly and anxiously praying to the Lord to set me free.It has gotten so bad that I have not finished my exam and that I went to psychologist.But no one have diagnosed me with this or told me yhat it was just intrusive thoughts or some sort of OCD.All they told me is that I had a rough year and my brain is mentally exhausted.It was only a year later that I came across religious OCD and it was the first time I didn’t feel alone.To see that other christians en people struggle too !! Two years later to day and I can really testify that the Lord will never leave you nor forsake you !! He is a good good Father,who loves His children and those who seek Him and His righteousness.Although the thoughts come and go,atleast now I know that they are just thoughts !! And my Heavenly Father knows my heart and my intentions !! I just want to thank you so much for this article,it has really helped me especially in times like this when my thoughts want to come back.
The Lord bless you !!
All my love !!
I’m so glad to hear that you’ve improved so much in recent days. God will continue to work on your behalf!
It’s hard to say
It was approximately 2 months ago that i have the first scrupulousity attack (was playing games and suddenly i have the thought of betting with the devil), and i fortunately have solved that problem by repeating some mantras("My soul is in GOD's possesion, you cannot take it"). Then few weeks after that, i have another scrupulousity strike (this time it was to sell my soul to the devil), then it is solved again by repeating some mantras again. And then another scrupulosity strikes again ( this time it is very weird, i am a male and i was having thought's of bearing the devil's child, maybe this was caused by a memory from watching the film constantine from 2005). And that is solved by repeating mantras in addition to remembering the fact that i am a male. And as for now, the only thing that happening is cycle of saying that the devil can scram and my lord is Jesus, and occasional prayers. Do i still have the scrupulousity or it is just myself? It is very very uncomfortable, but not to the point of causing anxiety attack(the worst anxiety attack was betting with the devil and sold my soul to the devil). And whenever i learn of something new, it seems this intrusive thoughts also have new weapons to play with. I hope that we can all solve this kind of problem soon enough. Cheers. May our Lord Jesus help us in this fight
These are common themes in religious OCD. The fear of accidentally making a deal or worshipping or selling one’s soul to the devil is one of scrupulosity’s most common intrusive thoughts. What you’re mentioning about bearing the devil’s child as a male is less common but I have encountered some cases of people with religious OCD obsessing about possible sexual abnormalities from supernatural causes. So yes — that particular one is less common but is part of the mix.
Knowing that these thoughts are obsessive-compulsive is one thing. Knowing what to DO about them is another. I would advise you to remember that part of the fright and “stickiness” of these thoughts is biological. People with OCD seem to have a predisposition to these kinds of repetitive, anxious thought cycles. However, part of the equation is also your own inner beliefs and life experiences (yep, it’s the nature-nurture balancing act — in OCD, we have both). How do we deal with these biological tendencies? We learn to coexist with the thoughts without fighting back against them, since arguing with our thoughts only gets us stuck in an unending cycle. But it’s also helpful to challenge our deepest presuppositions (the “learned” aspect of our OCD). I would ask you:
1. What is your picture of God like? Don’t be afraid to answer honestly: do you view God as dangerous or safe? People with OCD often have an untrustworthy picture of God and this fuels their need to meticulously control their environment and thought life.
2. What is your picture of yourself like? Do you see yourself as dangerous and somehow more powerful than God? Do you believe you are powerful enough to overturn God’s purposes for your life? When you trust something into His hands, do you take it back out? If so, why?
Working through these kinds of questions can help you find unbiblical assumptions that fuel the OCD patterns. Wishing you the best in your journey…
Thanks Jamie, your reply really mean so much to me. For the first question, my views on God is he is compassionate. Growing up on Catholic school (elementary school until high school), we learn to believe in God and his kindness.
For the second question, i see myself as nothing compared to Him. Honestly all this time i was not so religious, i would do things and then let it flow, if things go right sometimes i thanked God, if things go wrong, i blame my opposition. I've just returned to my religious life kinda 1 month ago, and the scrupulosity soons follow.
And now my mind is kinda automatically repeating the mantra "Glory to Jesus, demonic entities can go scram" everytime i dont have anything particular in my mind, which is almost all the time because of the corona pandemy, and when i try to pray sometimes my mind would insert the devil's name, resulting in me pausing my prayer and correcting it mentally, while reciting it normally in vocal. Is it still counts as scrupulosity or is it just myself?
This is typical OCD. 🙂 It’s safe to let it go.
did you really seek the Lord about this illness whatever it is cus I fear so many have demons telling them things of God and it isn't I want to receive this but fear what IF what if we truly who deal with this aren't God's Children I want to be absolutely want to make sure but glad I'm not alone many others deal with this why are we facing this I've cried out over 20 yrs for freedom healing felt God is mad at me and I won't be healed
That also happens to me too. Whenever I learn something new my mind would just start to attack that person when I didn't want to. This just happened to me a few weeks ago. I don't know why it happened but it got worse and worse. As soon as I saw this article I was relieved when I read this article. Thank God it wasn't that big of a deal. I feel bad for you I hope you feel better. 🙏
Hi.. i didn't knew that it was a mental illness i'm enduring until recently. It started happening during march when we had lockdown due to pandemic and i'm still having them til now. This time i feel like i'm drowning.. i feel like i've done something against a loveone that will cause them harm against the lord which i believe i haven't done but i feel like i've done already.. i keep remembering the scenes and my mind tells me i didn't do it but i'm still anxious i must've had..will the loveone of mine still be accepted by the lord or not? I'm just afraid that because of me God will not accept my loveone anymore.. i need help please.. thank yooou
I understand exactly what you mean. What you’re experiencing is something called “magical thinking” in the world of OCD. Magical thinking connects a cause and effect that are completely unrelated. For example, if I do something wrong, someone else will die, or be damned, or lose their job, etc. It’s the same faulty connection that lies behind OCD obsessions that connect a certain color or number with disastrous consequences (if I sit in seat 13, everyone on the train will die, or if I wear yellow I’ll get hit by a car, etc.)
Let me rather ask you to read Ezekiel 18. It talks about how God does not punish other people for your sins or punish you for other people’s sins. It is a very reassuring chapter for this particular obsession — read it and be encouraged. But also recognize the underlying OCD pattern, so if it morphs away from worrying about your loved one’s salvation to worrying about whether your yellow shirt will cause a car accident, you’ll know exactly what’s happening: OCD’s magical thinking.
Ohhh thank you sooo much.. that gave me a little bit of assurance.. but i would like to ask something again hehe.. if i knew to myself that i did not do something wrong.. like i keep remembering it and i keep having the same results in my mind that i didn't do it but i'm still anxious whether i did it or not.. does it usually mean that i've done that thing or haven't.. and right now i'm trying my best not to do the thing i'm afraid of doing.. and at the end of the day i re-evaluate myself and based on my memory i didn't do something bad but i still get nervous.. i hope you would be able to explain this for me because i really am getting a hard time.. and thank yoooou so muuuuuch..
And what if you made someone do something bad but they are not aware that it was bad and did it.. will they be punished for this or not?
I know exactly what you mean. This cycle of trying to remember if we actually did something bad or not is so annoying, right? It gets all of us at some point. But let me share a secret with you: religious OCD is a car that runs primarily on emotions. If you didn’t have those icky feelings of guilt, shame, distress, and anxiety, the thoughts wouldn’t bother you at all.
Here’s the thing — from the moment we are born, we start swallowing information from the world around us. Our parents, society, schools, friends, and colleagues feed us input about what’s true and false about the world. And, as you can expect, we get a lot right but we are limited by what’s provided by the buffet of life. So some of us swallow falsehoods and we grow up thinking it’s true. For example, the girl who grows up being told she’s ugly will eventually believe that, even though it’s a lie. All of us have some lies in our worldview. When we work through the OCD, it’s really important to learn to locate these lies, because we can then speak truth into our lives. Jesus said the truth will make us free — and this is just as true in OCD as it is in any other area of life.
Now, you get these bad feelings and get caught trying to figure out if you did something wrong or not. What is the untruth that is anchoring you to that unhealthy cycle? You may have heard of something called “emotional reasoning.” This is one of the common lies of OCD (and indeed, many people without OCD also get stuck in emotional reasoning, too). Emotional reasoning is a lie that says, “because I FEEL it, it must be true.”
Because I feel rejected, it must mean nobody likes me.
Because I feel stupid, it must mean that it would be a waste of time to try out for the math team.
Because I feel guilty, it must mean that I did something wrong (and thus need to spend extensive time in mental scanning and digging to figure out what I did wrong).
In this case, the best thing you can do is speak truth into your life. Recognize emotional reasoning for what it is and determine to let your life be guided by the Word of God rather than your emotions.
I have suffered terribly with scrupulosity and religious OCD for all my life and I made a promise to God about masturbation when I was about 12 years old. I went to medical school to study medicine and we had lectures and even graphic videos shown us about psychosexual matters that made me re -evaluate my promise. I did break my promise but in doing so had the sudden blasphemous thought to say 'fuck off to the holy spirit' and then felt rebellious that even if it was unforgiveable to say 'fuck off to the holy spirit rather than not masturbate then I would say this. I then became terrified about what I had wilfully done and have been living in torment and feeling condemned and far from God since and needless to say I have been tormented by repetitive blasphemous thoughts as well for years since. I try and believe in my heart that God understands the promise that I made as a child and that He does not view my thoughts at the time of breaking the promise as something that I really wanted to do.. Can you guide me and help me please?
I have a video about why we sometimes feel that we have “given in” to blasphemous thoughts. I’d encourage you to take a look at it. It helps explain the cycle of resistance and failure from the perspective of OCD.
Thank you! I’m glad it was helpful 🙂
I was reading your description of the OCD escalation cycle, and could really identify with parts of it. I get blasphemous thoughts a lot, and the impulsive urge to say them out loud. I have a much harder time believing saying it out loud is forgivable rather than just the thought.
So when I start to have those urges, I start to panic and am afraid I will give in and be dammed. Not that God wouldn’t want to forgive me, but He said that was unforgivable, and has to be true to His word.
I have talked to pastors and other Christians, and they don’t feel that’s what Jesus was talking about when talking about the unforgivable sin, He was talking about their unbelief. Also read some commentaries, etc. but I can’t shake the fear that they are wrong, and if I were to blurt something out against the Holy Spirit I would be lost.
You’re right – the unpardonable sin is nuanced and should not be taken in a magical or superstitious way — that is, we should not imagine that our words have abracadabra power to zap us out of the book of life. In John 10, Jesus said that no one is able to pluck us out of His hand. Not even you. Even if you make mistakes, God will lovingly pursue you to heal the relationship and will wait for you like the father of the Prodigal Son. The passages about the unpardonable sin are for a very different category of person and have a very nuanced application.
Hey I’ve been having these thoughts for some time now and at church I accidentally said I reject…. (Not Jesus) instead of saying I rebuke you in the name of Jesus Christ my Lord and Savior. My heart DROPPED!!!! Anyways do you think I’m ok? At one point in my life I did say something really negative towards Jesus (which I regret now).. these thoughts have subsided lately but from time to time they pop up and keep going. Do you have a tip I could use?
Hi, Abraham, I definitely recommend taking the time to read through this entire article for helpful tips. As I find verses or ideas that may be helpful, I’ll publish about them here on my blog.
I think it scarred my brain and i come up with negative stuff which are not alien but i reject them verbally